With Shaking Hands

Letters to no one

Some nights the thought of you burns my chest, heart starts racing so fast I feel it could tear through the skin straight to the floor still beating. The ground beneath my feet turns to quick sand and I'm grabbing the kitchen table trying not to go under while you're sound asleep across town. The stars remind me to much of your freckles and the moon holds to many of our secrets it hurts my eyes to go outside, most nights even drive. I was so caught up in the falling in love I forgot that sometimes you have to fall out of it too. I forgot that it could be so painful, it's not a rush like falling fast, it's like falling out of a tree and hitting every branch on the way down. I'm convinced one of the blows took out a lung because I swear since you left I can't breathe right. I used to have so much to say to you, and maybe I still do.. but maybe I should have known that I was to small to fit in your big hands. I show have known I'd slip through the cracks of your fingers.