With Shaking Hands

Letters to no one part three

I know this was all some game to you. I know that I didn't mean anything but a high you were chasing. The long conversations meant nothing. The hugs the kisses the beautiful words and songs all meant nothing. It's hard for me to believe that someone can look at you like you lifted the sun into the sky with your bare hands to laughing at the burns it left behind. You made me fall in love with you because you were bored and needed something to do. I fell in love with you because I meant it. Because you actually did mean the world to me. I'm glad that you get to be happy that's all I ever wanted for you. I wish I didn't have to be around your friends and I wish they didn't laugh and crack jokes about something that still hurts me. Everyone knew what you did and no one had the guts to tell me. They watched you ruin me and smiled. You get to tell people lies about us, you get to move on like this never happened. You get to escape the glares and the laughter. You get to be happy. I wish I could make you suffer the way that I'm suffering. I wish I could hurt you the way you hurt me.