This Won't End Well

25: How To Have a Impromptu Therapy Session

Gon sat on the couch, mulling and practically inhaling an entire pint of Cherry Garcia ice cream. From the window, Gon could see the sun starting to drain from the sky, leaving it a mixture of heavenly warm colors. It was six pm or so and the city was turning into a cacophony of honking and vulgar shouts. Ah, the joys of rush hour traffic.

That aching, borderline nauseating, insatiable guilt-ridden pit gnawing at Gon hadn't left his side since this morning, when he saw Retz. He knew, at any moment, Kurapika and Leorio would be home, prying about what happened when Retz got to the apartment. He wanted to tell them everything- to get on his hands and knees and beg them for their help in unravelling whatever he got himself into.

As if right on cue, the door flew open, nearly ricocheting against the wall as Leorio threw it open. Gon almost fell off the couch at the sound of Leorio busting into the apartment.

"What the hell happened, kid? As soon as we leave, all the good shit happens?" Leorio nearly screamed, running over to the couch Gon was laying on. "Well, what happened?!" He shrieked, looking at Gon intently and practically burning holes into his skull.

"Guys, I fucked up," Gon confessed, letting his head fall into his hands with an audible and heavy groan. He shook it back and forth, feeling sick to himself.

Kurapika slowly walked towards the couch, his shoes making small clicking noises on the wooden floorboards. "Tell me you didn't," He mumbled quietly. For once in his life, Kurapika wanted to be wrong. He wanted Gon to dispel everything his mind came up with. But from the looks of it, Gon was in no condition to do so. At least, truthfully, that is.

Leorio looked between the two, mostly lost but his imagination started to paint a picture he didn't want to believe. "Gon, what did you do?" He asked, confusion and premature yet justifiable disappointment apparent in his voice.

"I didn't do anything! It was all her. She came in and she said sorry. She said the reason she broke up with me was because at the time, she felt like she was losing her sense of self in our relationship- or whatever she said. But, now she realizes that she messed up and she wants me back. She said she wants to give our relationship another try..." Gon trailed off.

Kurapika and Leorio shared an uneasy look. They didn't like where this was headed.

"And? What did you say?" Leorio asked, slightly fearful of the answer.

Gon looked away, ashamed. He couldn't bring himself to meet their eyes. "I... I didn't really say anything. She left before I could give her an answer. She just told me to think about it and talk to her later."

"Well, what are you gonna tell her?" Leorio interrogated.

Gon looked nervously between the two before groaning in annoyance. "I don't know, guys! It's Retz!" Gon stammered out, burrowing his head into his hands.

"What about Killua?" Leorio asked. The pit that had been gnawing at Gon insatiably grew, finally swallowing him whole. He paled, the tan color seeming to disappear from his skin.

"What do you mean?" Gon asked quietly.

Leorio looked at him blankly. "You know what I mean. You're... doing whatever it is you're doing with Killua. So, how are you gonna tell Retz about him?"

Gon sucked air through his teeth, debating telling his roommates the whole story. He could see their disappointed faces painted vividly in his imagination. But he couldn't just not tell them everything. He did want their help, afterall, and he knew he wouldn't get that without telling them the whole story. "She kinda asked me if I was seeing anyone, or anything like that... but uh, I said no," Gon mumbled meagerly.