Inevitably Yours (Completed)

Shattered

Gulf entered the hospital and collided with Lhong. He immediately enquired, "Did you meet Mew?"

"It's none of your business."

Gulf controlled his anger. He wanted to punch Lhong in face. He definitely deserved it. This jerk had made his life hell for last month. He deserved a good beating but he was in hospital right now so he refrained himself.

"What are you doing here, Gulf?" Lhong narrowed his eyes.

"I'm here for Mew."

"Why? Are you worried about him? After everything he did? Do you love him? "

"That has got nothing to do with you. And whatever Mew did you are also responsible for that, more than Mew. You started this mess. Why did you do that? "

"Because you were trying to take him away from me. He was mine. How dare you fall for him?"

"I -" Gulf didn't know what to say. He wanted to deny the accusation but he wanted to accept them at the same time. How stupid was that.

"Wait a minute, you said 'was mine'. Why did you say that? " Gulf asked incredulously.

"Because I dumped him. Did you see how ugly he looks? Gosh, why would I stay with him now?" He rolled his eyes.

Gulf felt cold fury take hold of him. "You freaking scum. You are worse than vermin. Mew deserves better than a trash like you. All you care about is his looks?? Really? That man has done so much for you. How utterly ridiculous are you. Don't ever come near him. GET LOST." Gulf literally pushed Lhong out of hospital.

He couldn't believe someone could do that to their lover after being together for so long. That was beyond cruel. Mew had been a perfect boyfriend. He did everything a person could do for their lover. Lhong hardly ever did anything for Mew. No surprise, no gifts or appreciation yet Mew never complained. He was content with just being with Lhong. How could anyone dump someone like that? All because of some scars? How shallow and despicable do you need to be to do that?

Mew was looking out of window when Gulf entered his room. Gulf sat down on the chair near his bed. He wasn't sure what should he say to him. He wanted to console him but he didn't know how to do that. How do you even do that? A simple 'it will get better' won't work here. It would probably sound callous.

"I love him. I still do. Sounds stupid after what he did today but we can't always be smart about relationships, can we? Life would be so much easier if we could rationalize everything." Mew said with a sad smile on his face.

"You don't have to rationalize everything to move on." Gulf said softly.

"Move on? If only it was that easy. You probably hate him, Gulf. To you he must seem like a worthless jerk. And for a very good reason but to me he was kind. He took care of me. He loved me. How can someone so kind be so cruel as well? Where does such evil hide?"

"People can be cruel to even their loved ones."

"Right. You know, Mom said that I should forget him. I can't do that. I can't just forget him like that. Do we ever really forget someone? I don't think so. You must decide to stop remembering them but you can't just erase them from your memory. I won't ever forget how I met Lhong and the love we had, nor will I ever forget how he left me. These good and bad moments will stay with me forever. I'll never escape them." Mew said exasperatedly.

"That's how you move on, Mew. When you are ready to accept that there were bad moments, that's how you learn to move on.  You don't have to forget him, Mew. You just need to accept what he did to you. You need to realize that your love should be more about you than others."

"Yeah, I should love myself before anything else. I know yet it doesn't make any of this easy. Gulf, it's been so long that I have loved myself. I hope I haven't forgotten how to."

"I can remind you." Gulf said with a small smile.

Mew looked at Gulf and smiled for the first time since his accident. Maybe he could find his way back. He could get up and move on. Not immediately, not completely but little by little. It felt like everything was different, unfamiliarity of everything around him shook him at core. It was all same yet different. All the same people yet not familiar enough. He wanted to shake it off and get on with his life. He wasn't a kid, he was an adult. But he couldn't be adult about it. He couldn't be rational about any of this. Lhong meant world to him. He had pictured his rest of life around Lhong. Meeting Lhong had felt like one of the best moment of his life. Getting to know each other, building their life together, dreaming of their future, had been some of precious moments to him.

It hurt to know Lhong thought so little of him. A pretty face and black card was all he meant to Lhong. It made him question everything. Every moment spent with Lhong was under question now. A part of him hoped maybe Lhong had fallen for his money but along the way had started liking for him for the person he is. What was he lacking? But could he even blame Lhong? He didn't want to look at his own face either. He looked ugly, face full of hideous scars. No one could love that, right? It would be selfish of him to hope for that. Why should he make Lhong suffer along with him? Did he even have any right to be angry? Maybe he didn't have any right to be angry here. What should be do now?