The Pretender | Tom Riddle

37 | close to destruction

37 | close to destruction

Time seemed to almost fly by, or maybe disappear around her. She couldn't remember what day it was sometimes or how close she is to something. It sort of ate at her, like some type of plague inside her telling her that something was going to happen and there was no way for her to stop it. Made her feel ridiculous because she couldn't even pinpoint what it was. She knew it had to deal with Tom, almost everything had to deal with Tom.

It almost made her feel better that he wasn't in any better shape than her. He too looked like he was always on edge, dark circles under his eyes, disheveled hair, pale skin. He'd lost his color, his vibrancy everything. It was bittersweet to see him like this. To know that she was not the only one being driven crazy by something she couldn't even explain. At the same time though it felt worrisome, mostly because this was yet another thing she shared with him. Even in her misery she was realizing she was never alone with it as long as Tom was here.

So she needed to not feel so down, needed to do something that much she knew. He was appearing in her dreams again, small fractions or flashes of him laced through this damn storyline about a boy who lived she couldn't even explain if she tried. It'd been months and she still has no clue why she sees them or why she knows so much about this strange. Still didn't know why she'd see Tom either, not that she didn't know they were connected in some way, but more about what it had to deal with her. 

Even this sense of savior she had inside anytime she'd see Harry, she couldn't explain why it was her. Why she was stuck between both worlds, or parallels, or timelines—she still didn't know which it was, and why it had to be Tom. It made her wonder if she was the only one to be able to fix it. Except Seren didn't think that was possible, she wasn't a savior, she wasn't a grand witch, she was ordinarily plain. She didn't have a saving bone in her body, any form of leadership, or hardship, or any form of 'ship' that can make her into someone worth relying on.

So the question in the air was why her? Why was she the one stuck with these dreams, or nightmares, of someone in danger? Why was she the one stuck with Tom Riddle in almost every aspect of life even in her dreams. As a child it was easier to bear him, he was new and something interesting fr her. She hadn't grown up with him since the dawn of diapers so there wasn't this boredom attached to him like there was with Liam or Benjamin. He had been different, a breath of fresh air since she was eleven. Over the years it had turned into more of this tight rope keeping the two together. Whenever she'd think they were done being friends something would always pull one side into the other like a tug-of-war.

For a long time Seren believed she wanted to be friends with Tom. The two had grown up together in Hogwarts. He'd shown that she mattered to him even if it was in some weird way of protecting her. He'd always be by her side and never did anything to hurt her. Or at least that's what she thought anyway. Over the years she learned that he wasn't protecting her from getting hurt by others, he wasn't the one making sure whatever boy she was crushing on would treat her nice. He was injecting them within fear and intimidation, masking it with false sense of security. It was a part of his longtime plan to keep her at bay. To keep her and to have her only ever rely on him.

Maybe that's what would draw her away from him, his constant need to be the only person in her life. His attempts at controlling every aspect of her life just like her parents. To make her think that he was this perfect student, perfect friend or partner, when in reality he was evil. Pure fucking evil no matter how hard he tried masking it with those little kisses he peppers on her skin, his soft tone of voice when speaking to her or even his gentle hands running through her hair.

It was just an illusion, that's the conclusion Seren has made. It has all been this perfectly crafted facade Tom used to benefit him. To make him seem like he could never do wrong, never had bad grades, never spoke impolitely, never showed his true colors.