𝗕𝗮𝗯𝘆 𝗜𝘁'𝘀 𝗬𝗼𝘂 ❦ (𝗣𝗮𝘂𝗹 𝗠𝗰𝗖𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗻𝗲𝘆)

꧁𝗥𝗼𝗰𝗸 𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝗥𝗼𝗹𝗹 𝗠𝘂𝘀𝗶𝗰꧂

Paul and Linda found a bar that was serving breakfast not too far from where they were walking. It would be at least a half an hour walk back to the hotel which wasn't too bad considering the time they were out looking for something to eat. On this occasion, like many others, Paul was completely unrecognised by any of the staff. To them, he looked like any other British tourist and Linda, his British wife which was amusing to Paul and insulting to Linda.

She spent a full 2 minutes trying to convince the barman otherwise and even got herself a little frustrated with the assumption that she was married.

"No, you see." She rambled on. "I'm not his wife. I'm not even married. If I was, it would definitely not be to him." Paul chuckled, the barman grinning unbelievingly at Linda. He wasn't having any of it.

"Come on my dear wife." Paul cooed. "We must settle your stomach." Linda shot him a death stare.

"Are you being serious?" She jerked her head at the barman. "I'm not his wife!"

With great persuasion, Paul managed to get Linda to sit down at a table but wasn't successful enough in getting her not to glare at the barman every once in a while. Luckily, the barman found it most amusing and kept winking at the two of them to add salt to her wound.

Next, they ordered their drinks which was another thing that Linda got in a huff about when Paul tried to order himself an alcoholic beverage. "But it's not even 8 in the morning." She moaned like a British wife.

"It's probably the afternoon back home." Paul countered.

"But it's not here." She retorted.

The barman stood, grinning at the two. Linda caught his expression and death-stared at him again. "He'll have water."

Paul looked at her, shocked. "No, I will not." He refused.

"You're not having a beer, I've told you this already." She crossed her arms.

Paul really felt like he was married now but he never saw his marriage going along on the lines of him being ordered what to drink. In the end, he had to submit but refused to take the water and accommodated with orange juice instead.

The barman came with their drinks some moments later and passed them two menus. While looking through the options, Paul kept glancing up at Linda who once in a while glanced back, her eyes just peeking over the menu.

"What do you fancy darling?" He forced back the urge to laugh.

"Fuck off Paul." She put her menu down on the table. "Well then."

Paul looked at her, oblivious. "Hmm?"

"Come on, what are you having?"

"I've barely had a chance to look." He defended. "What was that two seconds?"

"So you're not going for the full English then?" She gave him a knowing look.

Paul was at a loss. A full English was exactly what he was going to go for.

"Whatever." He said, putting the menu down. "And I assume you're going for some salad shit."

Linda nodded. "Of course."

Paul scoffed. "Of course. We've gotta get you out of that."

"What do you mean? It's healthy." She stated.

"Yeah but too much of it and who knows. You could turn into a plant or whatever. You are what you eat an all."

Linda looked at him bemused with a small smile. "Ok, so you're a full English. What's that, sausage, egg, bacon."