DHMIS stuff - oneshots, headcanons and bullshit

Dhmis meets a Karen (X)

Me : okay so I have 3 requests I need to work on, the x reader, and even more WIPs and I have quite some motivation currently so I should probably get started with the requests first-

Brain : hey

Me : what

Brain : heyheyheyheuheuheuheuehehh-

Me : w h a t

Brain : okay so

Brain : stay with me here

Brain : but

Brain : what if we made the fuckers meet a Karen like all content creators do when they're out of ideas

Me : but I'm not out of idea-

Brain : SH

Brain : just trust me

Brain : this is gonna be lit

So low and behold, The Fuckers tm meet a Karen. Also this is 11/10 crack so don't expect a lot except for swearing violence and sex jokes kay let's go

(Also Sketch is a little more extreme about green in this one for absolutely no fucking reason whatsoever)

(O and I wrote in BBs POV somewhere in the fic with the whole lovecraftian creature stuff and I gotta admit that it might be the fanciest I've ever written)

It was a typical Saturday evening. The scent of children's meat being cooked filled the entire house, the distant screams of the people in the basement echoed along the walls, and the black paint Sketch had used to cover the plants to hide their green color was slowly dripping to the dark colored floor, so dark that all the previous blood stains from the various inhabitants of the house were barely visible anymore.

Shrignold was sitting in the living room, sipping on a cup of what he had initially thought was lemonade, but then again, you never knew it with this household. He could vaguely trace back the taste of deadly poison in the drink, what normally would have had him dying a very slow and painful death on the floor. But, the bright side of Gilbert poisoning everyone whenever he felt like it, was that everyone was now mostly immune to poison, which is always a handy thing to have.

His train of thoughts got interrupted by Tony storming into the living room, having to crouch a bit to get under the door with his god complex and top hat. He was covered in blood, most likely one of the trio's, or any of his fellow teachers if he got bored with the three. Anyways, Shrignold was not about to be the next victim, because he just got revived from Stanley wanting to "see what sauce would go nice with bugs meat". Asshole.

Thankfully, Tony didn't seem to have any murderous plans for Shrig. "Have you seen Harry anywhere? I need him." He said, trying his best to look intimidating which did not work when speaking to a cannibal (although, if he were to be a cannibal he would only eat butterfly meat...hm).

"No clue, why? It seems to me that you've already had your fun" Shrignold replied, putting the cup of whatever on the side table, motioning to the clocks blood stained outfit. Said clock huffed in return.

"Not for that. Hot Topic is having a restocking and I want to go shopping, and Harry just so happens to be the one in charge of money, which is greatly unfair"

Shrignold had to agree with him on that. For some reason, Harry did not trust anyone beside him and his two friends with his money, and guarded it like a hawk. Wonder why...

(Flashback to that one time Lamp had stolen all the money and the entire gang went out and spent it all in the Claire's and their local jewelry shop before promptly getting arrested for getting absolutely wasted in a toy store and the other three had to, to their huge dismay, bail the teachers out because they were too hammered to murder anyone)