A Demon's Heart

Chapter Eleven

My Boyfriend's Resurrection

Bill

I sprinted through the woods frantically looking for Dipper's grave, clutching the journal tight to my chest. My moronic, meatsack legs burned as I ran like never before. The surroundings around me blurred past as I searched like a bloodhound to a rabbit.

I skidded to a stop to a small pine tree and a mound of dirt in front of it. My throat and eyes started to burn like they have since he... passed.

Weeds were growing on top of the mound and the pine tree was a bit taller. I snapped my fingers and the dirt on top of his corpse was placed next to the hole.

I nervously stepped forward, my fists tightly clenched to the point my knuckles turned white. I looked to see the corpse of, you know who, and immediately spun around doubling over.

It was one thing to gaze upon a dead body of an enemy, knowing that you caused it. It was an entirely different matter to see the corpse of someone you held so dear to your heart.

I slowly stood up, grasping my side, feeling sick to my stomach. My knees wobbled, I felt as though I would soon collapse. I heaved in a deep breath and gathered all the courage I had in me.

I was so close to saving my dear Pinetree, yet so close to falling apart.

I retrieved the book and started the incantation.

"Mesomeatrom Fallasduioput HASGONDIAN TRYANGAMOIP!" I chanted.

As the spell ended, a blinding white engulfed everything. I opened my eyes and frantically looked for Dipper. I reluctantly looked at his grave, hoping to not see what I dreaded.

There he was, still pale and lifeless as before.

I failed.

I failed at loving him. I failed at keeping him safe. I failed at keeping sane. I failed at bringing him back.

I failed at everything.

My tears stung in my eyes beginning as dewdrops becoming cascading waterfalls. My soft crying turned into violent sobs and I screamed in frustration. I punched the ground and I slashed and scratched my face drawing enough blood to where it, like my tears, streamed down my face.

I fell to my knees and lied on the ground. I started laughing despite all my pain mentally and physically. I bellowed laughing like the insane, demonic, mad-man I was. My eyes fluttered shut, my useless human body forcing me to fall asleep.

Hold me up and take me in.

I'm losing it, lost again.

So maybe I fall,

maybe I fail.

Maybe my heart's not made of steel,

but I can't help it.

I'm not superhuman.

I'm breaking.

I'm breaking, don't let me fall apart.

Save me, don't let me fall apart.