Fade To Black

Chapter 12

Chapter 12

I can't sleep that night. My nerves are on edge and I toss and turn on the mattress. It's the most comfortable bed I have ever laid on, and yet I cannot bring myself to fall asleep. My mind stirs all night. It takes everything I have to not allow it to bring up a memory of Jacob.

Unable to take the silence anymore, I search for my computer in the darkness. I prop it up on my knees and open it, blinking as the bright light burns my eyes. Squinting, I pull up the Red Room site.

The screen turns black and red silhouettes of women flash across the screen as the site loads. It's tasteful, I will admit. It's not like other sites where you open them up and a huge pair of fake boobs blinds you. No, this feels high class.

Once the site loads, I move the cursor to the search bar. But, not before noticing photos of myself lining the bottom of the screen. I click one. A photo of me in white lace lingerie holding a glass of red wine covers my screen. A number on the bottom shows me how many views the photo has. They were posted this morning and this photo already has half a million views.

For some reason, my stomach tightens and bile burns the back of my throat. I close the photo. Drawing in a shaking breath. Now, it all seems real.

I don't click on any of my other photos, no matter how tempting, and go back to the search bar. I type in Kellen West and his page opens. But it's all black. I refresh the page, but nothing changes. I click on one of the free videos and it opens. The screen remains dark. But his voice echoes through my speakers.

Tonight, your body is all mine.

My heart lurches into my throat and I pause the video. But his voice still rings in my ears. The deep rasp causes sweat to coat my skin. My heart pulses in my chest as well as... other places.

I slam my computer closed and tuck it under my bed. Though my body never stops craving more. His words repeat over and over in my head. I force my legs together and tighten the strings on my pajama pants to fight the urge of allowing my fingers to wander.

It's no wonder why every woman here is obsessed with him. He practically made me come apart with just six simple words.

***

My eyelids are heavy as the sun rises the next morning. I couldn't get an ounce of sleep, not with my anxiety. And, not with Kellen's voice in my head. I walk down into my kitchen and search my fully stocked fridge, compliments of the Kenfield's. It's filled with all of my favorite things. Thanks, Jacob.

Fuck!

I wish I can stop thinking about him, just for a second. But I can't. All of this is because of him. I can't escape him. He's everywhere I look and has completely taken over my mind.

Losing my appetite, I slam the fridge closed. I need something to cleanse my mind. So, I run. I've never been much of a runner. There weren't any nice trails in the city by the apartment and the streets were too crowded. But here, it's like a whole different world.

I change quickly, not caring about what I look like as I throw on a pair of leggings and a sports bra. I tie my knotted hair up into a bun and speed out the door.

Cool air hits my skin and it gives me just the right amount of adrenaline. My legs propel me forward, already burning. But, it's a good distraction. So, I ignite the flames more, pushing my body faster and faster, beyond its limits until I find a steady pace. My feet slam against the ground in rhythm with my racing heartbeat.

A laugh breaks through the ringing in my ears. My feet tangle together at the familiar voice and I stumble forward. I catch myself before I tumble to the ground, holding out my arms, sucking in a sharp breath.