you're addicted to me, don't you know that I'm toxic? || Jang Hanseok FF

23 leaving France (throwback chapter)

(context: This is back in France, the day when Natalia (Seohae) left France to go to Korea to meet Hanseok. Blaise was her lover and their relationship soured overtime, and Natalia had accidentally killed his close friend Julien in a mission.)

The door slammed open and Blaise came in raging, with a note in his hand.

It was a photocopy of a plane ticket she gave her father for confirmation. Somehow, he got hold of it.

Natalia's eyes travelled down to the note that was grasped in his hand.

He knew.

"What is this Natalia?" He raised the crumpled piece of paper to her and threw it down.

"It's a long story. I have to pack this." She turned away to fold clothes to pack.

Blaise pushed her shoulder to force her to face him.

"When were you going to tell me?!"

She slammed her suitcase down. "When you finally sit down and listen to what I say, maybe."

"You can't go. I'm not allowing you to." Blaise went to open up the suitcase, throwing the pieces of clothes out. Natalia quickly pulled him away.

"Are you crazy right now? It's a mission I can't just abandon it!"

"I don't care."

"Are you even listening to me? I cannot-"

"Stop making excuses for your mistakes god dammit!" He snapped, throwing her suitcase down from the table, and the clothes sprawled everywhere. "Stop being a fucking coward and clean up your own mess rather than running to another country! I expected you to be better than this."

"What the hell is wrong with you? I told you the full story!" Her voice involuntarily raised.

"Yeah, you told me you fucked up. Grow up Natalia! Be responsible for your own actions!" He yelled.

"I tried, I really tried!" She cried out. "You think I didn't? I stayed up for a week straight trying to fix it! What more do you want?

Look, I'm sad, I'm devastated. So are you. And I'm sorry for everything I did. But nothing we do will bring him back to life, do you get it?

Some things can't be fixed, just move on."

He looked at her with disbelief. "Move on? Move? On? You're kidding me right now. We lost Julien because of you and you're telling me to FORGET ABOUT IT AND MOVE ON?" A vein popped put in his neck.

Natalia's breathing got deeper and her head felt lighter. She could hear her own heartbeat in her ears.

"Don't act like you've never killed someone before, you hypocrite! Look me in the eyes and tell me you've never killed anyone by accident before, you can't!"

"This is different!"

"How is it different?! Because I did it and not you? You condemn me for things you would forgive yourself for! Don't talk to me about your bullshit principles!"

"At least I don't run to another country like you!"

"Why can't you listen to a single thing I say?! God, you couldn't possibly be any worse." She scoffed.

He picked up the clothes and chucked them into the suitcase.

"Okay then, pack your shit and go. Run away like a fucking coward and never come back. Leave. I wouldn't miss you, nobody would."

"So you want me to leave now."

She could feel her vision getting blurry, tears threatening to spill. She clenched her teeth.