Yours

Chapter 8:Venting

Sylvia pushed Theo out of the hospital after physical therapy. She could tell that Theo was a bit discouraged afterwards. It was a challenge just to learn to stand up again.

"You did really well today," Sylvia tried to encourage on their drive back.

"You sound like the doctors," Theo mumbled.

"Is that a bad thing?"

"I don't want you to lie like they are, they have to, you don't. So don't," he angrily replied.

"I'm not lying, you had severe head trauma-"

"Please, stop."

Sylvia stopped talking, pulling into the driveway of his place.

She helped him out and into the house where Matthew was working. "Hey, thanks for taking him," He said, as Theo wheeled his way to a different room.

"Is he okay?" Sylvia asked.

Matthew sighed. "He's usually like that after therapy, he'll be okay."

Sylvia bit the inside of her cheek. "What's wrong? He's making progress."

"Slow progress, it's not easy for him, there's no timeline for progress and there's really no guarantee."

Sylvia looked at the door Theo had just left from. "You mean this all really could be for nothing?"

Matthew slowly nodded.

"I thought he had a good chance, that the chances of never fully recovering were slim."

"The doctors aren't so sure, head injuries are tricky that way."

Slyvia nodded and headed out following where Theo had gone. She found him in his bedroom, on his phone.

She softly knocked on the door. "Hey."

He didn't answer.

She slowly entered, standing behind him, resting her hands on his shoulders, slowly massaging his muscles. "You can vent if you want," she said.

"Stop," he said, trying to shrug her hands away.

She sighed, pulling her hands away, grabbing a chair and sitting down next to him. "Talk to me, yell, cry, whatever you need to do, just do it."

"I can't even get into bed without help! I'm stuck in this chair, I can't get my brain to do what I want it to do! I can barely feel anything. My whole life... I may never have kids, not that I ever thought about having any, but now I may never get the chance if I wanted to. On top of that, who'd want to be with someone like this their whole life? Always taking care of them? I'm just a patient for them, because I can't even have sex, I can't orgasm, but yet the slightest touch to my dick I get a hard on but nothing can happen because I can't feel it. I'm useless."

Sylvia sighed, listening until he finished. "Do you want my opinion?" she asked.

He shrugged.

"Okay, maybe you don't want to hear this, but you don't want me to lie. I don't think you're useless or just a patient, or whatever thoughts you may have. Also adoption is just as good as having your own kids. The perfect someone will come and want to take care of you. Isn't that love? Honestly, this is just making an easy way to see who's really serious about being with you and not using you for just a booty call. And on top of the whole sex topic, multiple men have reported to training their.. Pleasure... with other things, like touching elsewhere, or even having their thumb sucked."

"There's no way I'm finishing by my thumb being sucked."

"The point is, you can train your mind."

"Are you a virgin?"

"What?" She sputtered.

"You couldn't say orgasm."

She rolled her eyes. "No, I'm not."

"How did you find out about the whole thumb sucking-"

"I did my research," she quickly answered, not wanting him to finish whatever he was going to say.

"Why?" He asked.

She sat there, unsure of what to say, why had she researched it? She could be honest and admit she wondered if it was possible, the two of them, like she had imagined honestly more times then she'd like to admit.

"I had to write a paper in college on any topic for training your mind to do something for psychology," she lied.

"That must've been some paper. Bet the professor turned every shade of red."

Sylvia nervously chuckled, suddenly awkward.

"Shame, here I thought you were going to start sucking my thumb," Theo said, holding back his laughter.

"Absolutely not!"

The two of them laughed together til Sylvia was practically crying. She finally calmed down enough, she realized her hand was resting on his shoulder, but she didn't pull away.

"Thanks," he smiled, his own hand finding her thigh, and for once she was glad she wore shorts.

"For what?" She breathed, trying not to be distracted by the feeling of his skin on hers, his thumb rubbing circles.

"Everything," he sighed. "And you know if you ever need anything," he started, "A listening ear, or something more..." he drew to a whisper, his hand slowly inching up. "All you have to do is ask."

She quickly stood up. "Sorry, I just-" she stuttered, feeling like an idiot, he was practically offering everything she wanted, but that was one step closer to repeating what happened last time. Last time, it couldn't happen again, she ran her hand through her hair.

"I don't think we should... get involved."

"No, I know, I get it, it was stupid, forget I mentioned it."

She couldn't forget though, because it's what she wanted. She wanted him to be hers, all hers, only hers.

"I'm sorry," she quickly said.

"Don't be, I understand, really, forget it. I don't want us to be awkward."

"Okay," she nodded, sitting back down, trying to figure out something witty to say but she was at a loss of words when she just rejected what she wanted. But it was for the best, she knew that, yet she still felt the disappointment.