reasons to go, reasons to stay ➸ camren

chapter four ➸ resurrection

Camila had been staring at her phone for the past hour or so. She felt horrible. Physically and emotionally. Her body was sore from crying so hard, and her face was red and puffy for the same reason.

She needed to call Lauren, she knew she did. She was just scared. What if she hated her?

She wouldn't blame her, actually.

There was really nothing to lose, when she thought about it. She was already dead, right? Camila couldn't help but laugh at herself. She felt so... pitiful.

She wondered if that's how Lauren felt.

Camila inhaled deeply, turning her phone around in her hands.

She started playing mind games to talk herself out of it. She'd tell herself if the current time ended with an odd number, she didn't have to call Lauren. She looked over at the clock.

1:22 PM

"Shit," Camila breathed.

She tried distracting herself. She paced around her bedroom. She got up to get a drink from the kitchen, which only made things worse because she found herself staring at the picture of her and Lauren the entire time instead of actually getting a drink.

So now here she sat, in her room, with her phone, and once again with tears streaming down her face. She was going to do this, she owed it to Lauren. She just prayed that she didn't hate her more than she already hated herself.

She dialed the first number and took a deep breath, doing the same with every number in-between. And then she pressed call.

--

Lauren was brought out of her drunken slumber when she felt something move on her hand. Groggily, she sat up, realizing she was still on the floor. Her phone was buzzing.

"What the fuck do you want? It's two in the fucking morning!" she snapped, bringing her phone to her ear without checking to see who was calling. Anyone who called her at this time deserved whatever they got.

"Lauren..."

Lauren froze. She was going insane. She had to be. Just as she was opening her mouth to speak, she heard a different voice through the phone.

"Mommy?"

"Ro?"

"You are sad."

"N-no I'm not, bug. I'm just tired."

"Sometimes I cry when I'm tired, too."

"Everyone does that sometimes, Ro."

"I can't find my pillow."

"How?"

"He ran away!"

"Rowan Michelle, if you threw your pillow out the window again I'm gonna have to throw you out after it!"

There was giggling on the other line and Lauren heard two pairs of footsteps exit the room. She realized she was smiling and quickly bit the inside of her cheek.

Camila was dead, this was a dream.

She set her phone down on her bed, putting it on speaker and walking over to the mirror. She grimaced when she saw herself. She was a mess.

"Sorry about that... I-I... uh, hi?" a small voice came from her phone, and Lauren whipped her head around. She stayed quiet, pinching her arm to see if she was dreaming.

Lauren sat down on her bed. Camila was dead, that's what everyone had told her. That's why she hadn't heard from her in years. Maybe this was some sort of cruel joke.