Just a little bit of your heart ⎢Larry Stylinson

chapter 2

Everything changed from that moment on. Harry didn't talk to Louis and ignored his presence as best as he could. The other boys noticed, of course they did.

When Louis and Harry broke up for the first time, they all knew immediately. It was when Louis signed the contract and he distanced himself from Harry. But then Harry at least tried. He noticed Louis' change and he knew that what they had was over but he didn't ask about it in particular. Now he didn't even try to comfort Louis. Not one word, not a single moment in the arms of the boy who meant the world to Louis.

When they were at home, Harry stayed in his room the whole time and in the studio he sat on the ground on the other side of the room, knees pulled up to his chest and his gaze far away.

It hurt Louis so much.

Once, when they were getting ready for an interview, Liam had confronted him about it.

"Hey, Louis?", he had asked slowly as a stylist added some powder onto Louis' face.

"Hm?"

"What's with Harry?"

Louis had stiffened and tried to keep his cool, but of course he failed miserably. His friend had seemed to notice because he just gave him a quick hug and left him alone.

Right now, Louis was sitting at the kitchen counter, his laptop in front of him. He was scrolling through websites, trying to find a gift for his mum's birthday. He was interrupted when someone entered the kitchen and he looked up to see Harry standing in the doorway, his headphones in.

"Oh", he said and pulled one of them out of his ear. "Hi."

It seemed like he had gone out for a run because he was wearing jogging pants and breathing a bit heavily. He looked so gorgeous it made Louis' heart ache.

Louis cleared his throat before his thoughts could go wander any further. "Hey. How... how are you?"

"Fine." Harry went to the fridge and opened it, grabbing a bottle of water. He drank half of it at once and then looked at Louis again. "So... what are you doing?", he asked and looked at his computer.

"Just searching for a gift for my mum."

Harry nodded slowly. "She, um... She invited me. Also to Daisy's and Phoebe's birthday party."

"Oh." Louis felt a flicker of hope rushing through him. "Are you going?"

"I mean, I want to but..." Harry hesitated. "Don't you think it would be kind of... awkward?"

Louis stood up from his chair. "It doesn't have to be", he said quickly. This has been the most he had talked to Harry in weeks and he felt so enthusiastic he'd do anything to keep him talking.

Listening to Harry's voice was one of his favorite things to do. Not just him singing, but also just having a conversation. With Harry, you feel as if someone's actually listening and he always makes everyone feel better within seconds. Louis longed for him more than anything in that moment. So he walked around the kitchen island and also opened the fridge, just to have a reason to get closer to Harry.

"I don't know", Harry said after a while.

"Please?", Louis asked. "It would mean a lot to my mum, I know it. Also to the girls. And... me."

Harry looked at him and his green eyes sparked with something Louis couldn't quite place. "Why would it mean a lot to you?"

Louis frowned. "You know why."

"No."

He sighed heavily and turned around to face Harry directly. "It would mean a lot to me because I miss you. I miss being around you, I miss talking to you, I miss hearing your voice, just... everything about you. I miss how it used to be and it hurts so fucking much to know that it can never be like that again." Louis closed his eyes for a moment and when he opened them, he looked straight into Harry's green eyes, which were staring at him with such an intensity that Louis swallowed thickly. "You're my favorite person, Harry", he whispered and his voice broke. "And it hurts that you don't talk to me anymore."

Harry stayed quiet for a moment. "It doesn't have to be like this and you know that", he said quietly. "It could go back to how it used to be. Just say it. Say the word and I'm yours."

Louis took a deep breath, and watched the boy he's been in love with for over 3 years now. Sometimes he still saw the little 16-year old who liked to cuddle late at night when he couldn't fall asleep.

"You know I want that", Louis answered slowly. "But you also know that I can't."

"You can, you just don't want to."

That hurt and Harry knew that. He knew Louis wanted to be with him, it wasn't as if Louis kept quiet about that.

"I'm doing this for you, not for me."

Harry rolled his eyes. "God Louis, why can't you be a bit more selfish? I'm all yours if you want me to be. While you're trying to do what's best for me, you're doing the exact opposite."

"I'm just trying to get you to live your dream!"

Harry threw his hands up in frustration. "And you're doing it again. Open your fucking eyes! I don't need any of this shit." He took a deep breath before he continued. "We could just quit, you know", he suggested in a low voice. "We could run away... or start our own singing career. But most importantly, we could be ourselves."

Louis hesitated for a second. The life Harry was describing sounded way too good to be true, and he wanted nothing more than to live it. But he knew he couldn't. Maybe Harry was right, that what Louis was doing wasn't the best for the two of them, but Louis knew what he signed up for and he wasn't going to quit.

"We're working on our third album right now", he said slowly. Harry gave him a confused look but seemed to relax a bit. "Which means in a couple of weeks, we're going to be in the spotlight again. And you know who most of it should be on? You. Because you deserve the love and the recognition and I want to see you live that. Even if it means setting my own needs behind. You are the most important thing to me and I don't want you to regret anything later."

"Regret being with you?" Harry laughed, but he didn't sounded amused at all. "I've not regretted a single second I spent in your presence and that's never going to change." When Louis didn't answer, his eyes turned a little bit softer. "It's just enough if you're there, you know. Sometimes, being you is what I need the most... You know what, scratch that, you being yourself is what I need the most, always. You're my safe place. Were, at least."

With a last sad smile to Louis, he turned around and left the kitchen. Louis heard steps walking up the stairs while he was left in the kitchen, trying to figure out how the hell he was going to deal with this.