Monachopsis

Chapter 13

CW: Hinted drug trauma, non-con mentioned, shots, panic attack
A/N: FYI, I'm trying to make these chapters longer, thank you for reading my fic! <3

'Ugh, this is stupid.' They thought to themself as they struggled to wash their own hair. 'Nurse Amelia gave me way too many numbing shots. I can't even feel my hands.' He let a strained laugh out as he opened a bottle of face wash.

His right leg was in a sling that was hanging from the ceiling, so he had to balance on his left foot and either lean against the wall or hold onto the sling's straps. Their breath was heavy enough without the strain of balancing, due to the chest wound that was wrapped so tightly and put into a water-sealed corset.

They felt like an idiot, struggling to stand in the shower fully clothed.

Fully immobilized.

Completely weak.

Utterly...'useless.'

'You should've killed that jerk while you had the time.' As he quietly yelled at himself, he accidentally knocked his body wash onto the floor of the tub.

'Dang it.' They huffed. Reaching for the sling's latches, he undid them, and slowly lowered himself onto the floor of the tub. They almost grabbed the bottle before a shot of pain coursed their body.

'Frick! What the heck...' he laid down on his back, laying his head onto a shower pillow. They closed their eyes with a grimace, until the shots of pain subsided.

They were gone. So why wasn't he getting up?

'I don't wanna get up.' He realized.

As they laid on the cold shower floor, they raised their hand and watched the water hit it and run off and down his arm. He smiled faintly before letting his eyes close.

— — —

"Ranboo." He slightly opened his eyes to see Papa J staring at him. They closed their eyes again.

"What?"

"What? What? That's all you have to say? You've been laying here for hours."

"I don't wanna get up."

Papa J huffed, "you don't wanna get up, huh?"

'Yep.' They thought. "Yes sir."

"Why not?" J questioned.

"I don't wanna get up."

He huffed, so Ranboo added, "to much work. No point."

Papa J's eyes widened at them. "Are you serious? Ranboo." He sighed as he turned their face towards his. "Ranboo. Look at me."

Ranboo reluctantly opened his eyes.

"You are stronger than this. Smarter than this."

"Ranboo, you're better then this."

"No." Papa J sighed. Meakly, Ranboo smiled at him. "I'm weak. I'm pathetic. I should've slit that man's throat. Didn't even put up a fight."