Spending New Year's Eve with Chan had become tradition by now. Even though the two of you weren't really the party type, you still enjoyed the festivities that your friends invited you to. You had spent most of the night glued to each other side.
That was until a particularly beautiful friend of Chan's showed up.
You felt your heart sink as Chan announced that he was going to go greet her and that he'd be back shortly. You couldn't help but to let the jealousy fester inside you at the way his arm slipped around her waist as they hugged in greeting.
She was gorgeous.
Her smile grew even wider than before as she laughed at something he said, gently patting his chest. Their eyes never left one another as they spoke amidst the crowd of their friends.
You knew you had no right to be feeling the way you did, after all you were the one that rejected him. It was selfish to still want to have him all to yourself. You had a chance, a perfect opportunity to be with him like you had always wanted but you blew it. You let your insecurities get in the way.
You had wanted to try again tonight. You no longer wanted to let your insecurities keep you from being with him. He liked you and you liked him, maybe even loved. That should have been enough right? But as you watched the two of them from your lonely corner of the room, you realized that he really and truly deserved better.
He deserved someone like her.
You waited a little while longer. The closer it got to midnight the more hopeless you felt. It was less than 10 minutes now until the countdown would start. You watched as people rushed about the party in search for someone to spend the first few seconds of the New Year with.
You watched as Chan turned, eyes searching until he found yours where he had left you, shooting you an apologetic look.
He turned back around, saying something to his group of friends before bowing slightly and making his way to leave. Before he could however, the girl had slipped her hand into his before leaning up and pressing a kiss to his cheek. His friends whistled at the woman's bold move but all you could hear was the ringing in your ears as they stared at one another. Not wanting to see them kiss you made an escape from the room and out onto the balcony.
You gasped as you closed the door behind you. Your lungs burned as you inhaled deeply, trying to keep yourself from crying.
You had no right to cry.
This was your own doing. If only you could have been selfish for once, that could have been you instead. Now it was too late.
At least that's what you thought. You heard the door slide open behind you. You turned assuming you'd find that someone drunk had stumbled into your serene space but that wasn't the case.
Your heart clenched as your eyes locked with his. Chan took one long stride towards you, gently wrapping his arms around you before pulling you into his chest. You felt the fast, erratic thrum of his heart beneath you cheek as he nuzzled his nose into your hair.
"I'm so sorry."
You don't know what he was apologizing for. Was it the kiss? Was it cause he didn't have feelings for you anymore? Was it because he had left you alone?
You pulled back slightly, his hands gently cupped your face as you were met with his intense gaze.
"I only like you. I only want you."
You felt your eyes sting as you shook your head, "How could you? I-I rejected you."
His eyes softened as he sighed.
"Because I know that's not what you wanted to do. No matter how many times you reject me, it's not going to change the way I feel about you," he finished as he pressed a soft kiss to your forehead.
"I thought you deserved better," you mumbled as he pulled you into his chest once more.
"I'm the one that doesn't deserve you."
You could hear the sadness in his tone as you pulled back from him to look into his eyes.
"Chris—."
Your words halted as he cupped your face once more. You shivered under his touch as you the muffled sounds of the party goers counting down could faintly be heard from where the two of you stood.
Five.
"If you'd let me," he whispered as his forehead pressed against yours.
Four.
"I would like to kiss you at midnight and everyday from now on."
Three.
You giggled as your arms wrapped tightly around his neck.
Two.
"You have two seconds."
He let out a huff of laughter as he pulled you tighter against him, "Perfect."
One.
Your lips met as light illuminated the sky. The sounds of cheers fading as the two of you got lost in one another.
Happy New Year!
