degenerate - bja

08

september 27, 1989

                          IT WAS a little after 7, and i was almost at the field, nothing wrong with being a little late. when i got a little closer, i saw that everyone was there except for rose (who was always late to everything), and me of course.

"guys!" i called out.

they turned to me, and angelina was the first to greet me. "cooper!"

i started to jog slightly towards the group.

"coop-dog!" from tre.

"yo! hey!" from billie.

and a perfect smile and wave from mike.

i sat down with them. "rose coming?"

angie clicked her tongue. "should be, you know she's always late."

i agreed, cause obviously that was true. "so, uh, mike you said that you guys would be like, smoking? right?"

he looked around at tre and billie. "uh, yeah. i think we we're gonna wait till everyone got here to start all that, but we can bring it out now if you want."

"oh no, no. that's okay, sorry. i just, like- i've never done anything like that before. i mean i've drank- but never a lot. sorry i know that's kind of lame."

"no man that's not lame." assured tre. "i never smoked or anything till i met these guys." he said, fist bumping billie.

"hiiii!" yelled someone in the distance, who i recognized as rose.

"rosie!" i yelled back to here. "c'mon!"

she plopped down next to tre, she definitely liked him. whether or not she knew it herself, i could tell. "sooo how are you guys?"

we all confirmed we were good and stuff, then billie pulled out a six pack of beer, it looked like a convenience store knock off of corona. "who wants one?" he asked. there was 6 of us, so it was a perfect match, i might as well have one.

"i guess i will." i said, and he handed me one.

"cooper?!" rose. "since when do you drink?"

"well you know," i brushed it off, trying not to sound lame. "i do here and there."

"shit, cooper, is this your christening?" tre asked sarcastically.

i couldn't help but laugh and shake my head at his stupidity.

mike nodded. "well we are honored to be a part of it."

"to cooper!" billie raised his beer in a toast. we all clinked our bottles, to me i guess.

we sat around nursing our beers for a bit, joking around, when i noticed billie say something to mike and scoot closer to me.

"hey." i smiled, feeling a small fog clouding my thoughts. most likely from the beer.

"hi." billie leaned back on his elbows. "you liking your drink?"

i shrugged, "kinda tastes like piss, no offense." i felt a little bad, but it was the truth.

"none taken, it's not mine anyway. my stepdad's." he explained, i saw sort of a sad smile appear on his face.

i didn't want to pry, but something didn't seem right. "do you.. like your stepdad?"

he sighed, i got the sense i maybe shouldn't have asked. "not really, he's a bit of a bitch. but hey, a bitchy stepdad is better than no dad?"

i simply nodded. "i get it. my dad kicked the bucket a while ago, when i was 10. my mom like- refuses to date again. it sucks sometimes."

"same age for me too. how's yours go? mine got cancer."

it may seem insensitive to just casually talk about your dead dad, but that's how people cope, dude.

"motorcycle accident. i'm sorry by the way."

"don't be. i don't want a fucking pity party. i hate when people make it a big deal."

i was drinking more while we were talking, and i was slurring my words a little. "god, me too. i hate when people make anything a big deal y'know. like fucking homecoming! why is it such a big deal? school dances happen all the time. if i were to want anybody to ask me to homecoming, i would want it to be a little private thing, asking me on our own time, y'know?" i was talking to the ground, while i could tell he was attempting to make eye contact while i rambled on.

"mhm. totally. you got anybody in mind for the dance, speaking of it?"

maybe if i was more sober i would've seen that these questions were a bit off.

"i mean, not really. but of course every year i secretly hope someone will ask me. i've never been asked out once, can you believe that?" i was getting sloppy, being a lightweight was embarrassing. i really needed to drink more.

he looked surprised, "no, i actually cant. but, i'm sorry your beer tastes like piss, you'll get used to it after a little while, though." he smiled, one side of his mouth going hinder than the other. and with that he went back over to mike.

they brought out the weed, which may have been one of the reasons billie walked off. tre was singing some song about 'roll, roll, roll the joint, twist it at the ends. light it up and take a puff and pass it to your friends' while rolling one and handing it to rose.

"what was that all about?" angelina whispered to me, passing me the joint. i assumed she meant the thing about billie.

"no clue." i responded, which was the honest truth. i tried to seem cool while taking a hit, but just ended up in a coughing fit.

"your first time smoking pot too, huh?" mike joked.

"shut up, dick." i playfully responded. flipping him off while crouching over, yacking my lungs out.

we continued to pass it around, until i realized i was actually crossfaded, actually officially crossfaded. shit.

☆

"hey man" billie grunted, sitting back down next to mike after making conversation with cooper.

"did you talk to her?" he asked, almost like a scared puppy.

"yes, i talked to her, mike."

"what did she say? i mean, what did you find out?"

billie took a deep-ish breath. "well, she loves when guys make a big deal out of things."

mike looked confused. "so what do i do?"

"uh, we'll you should do a grand gesture, y'know. i was only joking the other day at pe, but maybe you should do something along the lines of that."

"great, thanks so much."

billie didn't know or understand why he lied. he didn't have anything against mike or cooper, obviously.

but he did not want them going to homecoming.