Wanna be Loved

•3•

The next day in chemistry class, Hanna turned around and passed me a note.

*can you come tonight? *

I look at her and smile. I quickly scribble down my answer and pass the note back.

*yes:)*

She reads the note, smiles and passes the note back to me.

*awesome! Can't wait!*

"Me too" I mouth to her.
"Okay class! We have had our lab partners for two Months. I will now switch your lab partners" A bunch of cries and complainants were heard in the class room. "Enough! It's time to freshen up things! wether you like it or not!" Mr.Lincoln yelled at the class. He seemed to shut them up. Then, he started calling out student's names. I wasn't really paying attention until he called my name. " Ellie Voight, you're partnered with Noah Herger. " he said calmly. I definitely wasn't calm. I was panicking. I had butterflies in my stomach. I don't know what I felt... I just know I felt my chest get tight. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't move.

"Hey." Noah said almost sounding bored. I didn't answer. I couldn't. I froze! I knew I should just say hi back but nothing came out. I just stood there. Completely still, unable to move.
"You alright?" He asked flashing me a look of concern with his blue eyes. Snap out of it Ellie!! I told myself. Luckily, It worked, as usual.
I put on a smile and tried to sound as normal as possible. " Yeah, everything is A okay! I'm great!everything is awesome! How are you? "
"Um.. Okay..?" He said, yep! I nailed it!

Later that afternoon, I was in my bedroom, trying to find something to wear for tonight. I emptied out my closet and put all of my clothes on my bed, going through each outfit I owned, looking for the perfect thing to wear. I sighed, nothing was perfect enough!
Suddenly, I heard a quiet knock on my door frame. I turned around to see Erin. "Hey.. Whatcha doing?" she asked signaling to the huge pile that had
formed on my bed. "Oh, that.. I was invited to my friend's birthday party. I'm just trying to find something to wear." I explained the bazaar scenery. Erin looked at my bed for a minute or two and dug out a Butiful white laced dress I had sewn.
"How about this? It gorgeous! " she asked holding the dress up. "I don't know.. My dad probably won't approve of it.." I said. I made that dress.. I didn't want to wear it just yet. If I loose just a few more pounds, I'd wear it.

"Hmm.. I think I found one.." I said with a smile growing on my face. It was a Butiful flowey yellow dress. "I like that. " Erin smiled. "How do you have so many clothes anyway?" She added with a chuckle. "some I bought but most of them I sewed.. " I said while picking up the white dress Erin picked out before. "This one, I sewed and this one, I bought" I said pointing at the yellow dress. "Hold up. You sewed this??" Erin asked in surprise. "Yeah.." I whispered and looked at my feet. I tend to do that a lot, trying to avoid eye contact.. I just don't do well with people, even if they're people that I love and care about. "Ellie! You are really talented! The outfit you sewed for Dani. You have a bright future ahead of you." Erin exclaimed. I smile and started folding my clothes and putting them away.

"So... Why are you even here? Don't get me wrong, I love having you around but.. It's just.. You're never here any more. I was just wondering what changed that." I asked as I was folding my clothes in a faster pace. Erin took a deep breath and sat down. "Ellie, honey, your Dad and I are really worried about you, is something bothering you? Someone?" She frowned. "No, I'm fine. Everything is great." I nodded and started folding the clothes in a even faster pace. She didn't seem convinced. "Hey, it's okay if you're not okay, alright?" She said and put her hand on my hand stopping me from 'stress folding'. "I'm always here for you. Just remember that." I smiled and nodded at her. I wanted to tell her about everything going on so badly that it hurt, but I couldn't seem to bring myself to do it. She sat there for another minute, looking around my room and then she got up with out saying anything and left the room.