Green Flag In Progress | Ryeji

01 | The Girl Who Bloomed

Twelve. 

Shin Ryujin found out that she's gay when she was twelve. 

At some point of her childhood, girls did confuse Ryujin. Not because she feels attracted to them, but because of who attracts them.

Boys. 

"The new transferee is very handsome, right?"

'He is handsome, but not to an extent that I would gush over him.'

"I have a crush on him!"

'Really? What did she see on him?'

"One day, I will get married to a cool man like my Dad!"

'Marriage? Too early for that. A man? Uhm…no.'

She tends to question the girls around her. She wondered, what exactly are they seeing that she can't see? Why can't she feel something for a boy? Is there a problem with her?

Well, technically, she thought that there was a problem. 

Because when she saw the daughter of their new neighbor, the little Ryujin felt something that she had never felt before. 

What do you call that again? Butterflies in the stomach?

Yeah, that's right. She felt the 'butterflies in the stomach'. A phrase that her girl friends would say whenever their boy crushes would talk to them. 

But the thing is, Ryujin felt it with a girl. 

And the first thing that came into her mind after that was, 

'Oh, I'm in trouble.'

Worried about what she felt, she immediately went inside her house and searched for her parents. She ran towards them, almost crying because of panic.

"Mom! Dad!"

"What is it, honey?" Ryujin's Mother asked.

"Why were you running, sweetheart?" Ryujin's father added. 

"I…I want to say something…" The little Ryujin mumbled, a bit afraid of what her parents might say. 

"Tell us, Ryujin-ah." 

And so, little Ryujin told what she felt earlier. She told all the questions that bothers her. She told her confusion about the girls and their crushes. She talked about her aloofness towards boys. She talked about everything that she kept inside her mind for years. 

After Ryujin spoke, her parents didn't say anything immediately. They were quiet. A bit shocked, even. As if they weren't really expecting it to come out of their daughter's mouth. 

Ryujin almost cried, almost. 

Because when her parents suddenly smiled at her, her worry turned into confusion.

"W-why are you both smiling?" Little Ryujin asked her parents. 

Her mother and her father glanced at each other, before turning to her. 

"That's completely normal, honey. It's okay to feel like that." Ryujin's mother said, rubbing her daughter's arm to sooth her. 

"It might be a little different than most of your friends, but it's not wrong or illegal." Her Dad spoke, patting her head. 

"B-but...what is this feeling? Can you tell me?" Ryujin asked. 

Her mother smiled once again.