𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐌𝐀𝐙𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐒𝐏𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐑-𝐌𝐀𝐍..
Not all heroes get remembered and surely not all heroes have it all; this story is about the hero who was never where she was supposed to be. Wrong place, wrong time, life gets confusing until a...
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Peter's palm cleared the autumn leaves and thin layer of snow trying to hide the name of the one gravestone he always seemed to find with ease. "I'm back again," he murmured to it, for that was as close as he was ever going to get to the name his fingertips brushed the ridges of, cleared the carving and made it be visible again how it read out: Gwen Stacy. After all this time, his hand still shivered, but not from the cold wind that blew carelessly amongst the marking stones of the dead, yet rather from remembering his loss and, though he might have finally learnt to live with it, in that moment when he stood before her stone, the pain was infinite again and he was but a servant to its everlasting presence in his life.
"I have news." Peter sniffed his cold, red nose. "That's why I am visiting right now. You see," he began standing up, his coat ruffling in sound and him digging his shivering hands like shovels into the warmth of his pockets, "I found someone. Or someone found me. It's hard to explain how exactly it happened, Gwen, but I want to let you know that I will never forget you, even though that illusion in my mind is beginning to fade and it looks like I am moving on."
He took a step back with that declaration and his steps felt heavy. It was harder than he thought it would be to come there and let her know of all that happened. "After I lost you, I thought I would never be able to love again, not when I know I should have been able save you the way I save everyone." Addressing the gravestone, he looked down the whole time. "I wasn't just filled with guilt, I was living in that feeling, letting it consume me, stop me from living a life. Clear rules, no attachments, I lived day by day for that mask and subconsciously... I always knew I was letting you down, Gwen. That's why I kept seeing you."
The wind was the pause, carrying his thoughts to a brisk clarity. "I want you to know that you can rest now. I won't keep your restless in my mind anymore, Gwen Stacy. I... Wendy Weber taught me there's still love I can give and I make a vow to you right now that I will learn from my past mistakes. I won't repeat them."
Peter inhaled sharply. I love you, Gwen, I always will. But I am letting you go now, so I can live and you can move on.
Into this thoughts, she knew she heard him, because looking up, through the thicket of dark clouds about to call a snow upon them once more, came a little speck of light, a smile from whatever was beyond and what Peter will never hallucinate of again. He left a flower at her grave and stepped away, not for the last time entirely, but for the first time without a heavy heart. It was the first time his steps carried him out of the graveyard not with a burden, but with relief; and that relief made him excited to be home.
