Alive Again || Tanner X Gold Crackfic

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AUTHOR'S NOTE, PLEASE READ:
This is entirely meant to be a shitpost, a meme, a joke, and a gift for a friend after we made a inside joke.
To clarify: this is for fun and not meant to be serious in the slightest. So please don't come after me if you don't like the idea of a ghost and a reanimated corpse making out.
Anyway, i hope you enjoy the story!

ALL SPELLING AND GRAMMAR ERRORS ARE INTENTIONAL!

White bitchy boy ghost was floating around a black void, the horizon seemed endless.
He had no idea how the hell he got here, all he knew was that he needed to find his sister and then somehow find a way out.

He groaned,

"Ugh, how the FUCK am I gonna find my sister when she matches the FUCKING BACKGROUND??"

When all of a sudden, he sees a figure come out of the darkness before him, but it wasn't his sister, no...

This guy was actually hot.

"Yo who tf are you?"

He asks, and the sexy stranger simply stares him down with empty, soulless eyes.

"Bro you got no arms and legs, you got no ears too? I asked you a question."

Tanner continues to press the stranger for their identity, and finally, the sexy hot SMOKING stranger speaks.

"I'm dead."

Tanner blinks, before holding his hand out.

"Hi Dead, my name's Tanner!"

The armless being stared at the other's hand, before looking back at them, his expressioning becoming one of angr

"Are you deadass- you fucking idiot, i'm actually dead."

Tanner blinked again, before slowly putting his arm down.

"..oh."

Suddenly, Tanner perked up as the realization hit him;

"Wait, I'M DEAD TOO!"

The armless being's angr turns to one of interest and intrigue.

"Wait, really? No cap??"

Tanner nods excitedly, a grin on his face showing up.

"I dunno wtf cap means cause im from 1907 or some shit but yes, im also dead, like you!"

Tanner's new friend seems to warm up a bit, finally giving him his fucking name.

"Finally, somebody I can relate to. Btw my name's gold lol."

Tanner stared gold down. (Totally not checking out that sexy 70% of a body 🤪)

"Whys your name gold when you look all silv-"

Tanner was cut off by gold shushing him with his exposed arm bone.

"Shut, shut the fuck up, my names gold, not silver. Silver is my rival. He's a fucking asshole. He took my wife and he fucking pissed on her. We do not mention that name."

Tanner looked apologetic, as he lowers golds arm stub bone thing.

"Oh.. gee, well, I'm sorry about tha-"

He was once again shushed by gold.

"Shshhshshhh- it's okay, i divorced her ass a long time ago. Anyway,"

Gold finally backs away from Tanner, looking at him with his expression curious.

"How did you die?"

Tanner looks taken aback by the question, he awkwardly tugs at his collar as his gaze shifts away from gold.

"Ehehahah... well, its a long story, I caught something called ligma."

Gold slowly blinks, despite not having fucking eyes. He asks,

"..what's ligma?"

The two stand in silence for a moment, before they both burst out into laughter.

"Ah, ah man, this is the least dead inside I felt ever since I died-"

Tanner chuckles, wiping a bit of ectoplasm from his eye.
Gold nods in agreement.

"Yeah, man, it's just been so hard since i divorced my wife.. and since i lost my arms. Its nice to finally have someone to relate to.. yknow?"

Tanner gave a nod in response,

"Yassss ikr?? The only other dead person i know is my sister, and shes a bitch."

Gold cackled,

"Damnnnn.... woman amirite??"

Tanner couldnt help but laugh along,

"I know right? Thats why i find guys to be way hotterr."

They both pause as they stare at each other in silence. Eventually, it was brokren by gold speaking.

"..does this mean... you think im hot?"

Tsnner jolts, stammering a bit

"WELL UH UHHHH YES BUT NOT IN A GAY WAY-"

For the third time, he gets shushed by gold, by him shoving his bones in tanners mouth.
Tsnner thout it tssted nice

"Ive heard enough."

Gold stated in a rather intimidating manner, which just made this ten times more hotter
Tanner sweats despite being a ghost.

"MmpmMhh???"

Gold looks at him with a grin.

"Kiss me you damn cloud."

He finally removes his arm bone from tanners mouth and somehow pulled tanner in for a kiss despite having no arms.

And then they had a super hott and sexy make out sessionn!! It lasted for 3 years.

When they finally pull back they stare into each others eyes, feeling their non existing hearts beating as one.

Tanner nervously chuckles,

"That.. that was nice.."

Gold smiled.

"Same"

All of a sudden two white dots show up in the void and a female voice yells.

"TANNR WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!"

Tanner looks at his sister and panics

"MARIE? WHEN THE HELL DID YOU GET HERE??"

"JUST IN TIME TO SEE YOU KISS SOME RANDOM ASS AMPUTEE!"

Gold was just 🧍‍♂️ (minus the arms and legs)

TNeer rertorts,

"Well, not MY FAULT YOU LOOK THE SAME AS THE FUCKING BACKGROUND YOU CAMOUFLAGED BITCH!"

Gold stood (more like floated) in between the two, tryning to avoid a fight.

"Guys, guys, we dont gotta argue about this, how about we get out of here and get some lunch??"

The ghost twins agreed and then they all went to taco bell to get the new taco bell chicken wings.

Tanner and gold soon got married and everybody was happy, the end.

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