KiLL la KiLL - AMBIGUOUS

Pink Carnation... Tease

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Reminiscence [Few Years Prior to Meet & Greet]
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[Matoi Residence] (F/n's Bedroom) --Night--

"(F/n)!"

His eyes opened.

He hadn't even realized he had fallen asleep, and the exhaustion from the nightmares made it feel like he hadn't at all. It had been a while since he'd had nightmares of his old foster homes; nowadays most of his nightmares involved himself getting taken down in a battle with Ragyou or stumbling upon mortally-wounded teammates desperately asking why he hadn't been there to save them. He'd started to think his foster homes were something he'd finally started to put behind him.

That was the thing about things being behind you, he supposed. It's that much easier for them to take you by surprise.

As he pulled himself from sleep, he focused on what had woken him, and to his surprise, Kinue was kneeling next to him, gazing down at his face. Her brows were furrowed, arced in a way that was softer than the glare (F/n) had been growing accustomed to, and her eyes were intense as they bore into him.

"Um.." (F/n) mumble, "Sorry, we getting up?"

He started to shift, ready to roll onto his feet, but Kinue stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. "No," she said, "It's not morning. You haven't been sleeping long."

"Oh. So, um, why...?" (F/n) was to question.

"You were dreaming." Kinue said.

(F/n) dropped his gaze in embarrassment, "Oh, damn. Sorry, I-I was making noise.. I, um, didn't mean to bother."

Kinue: "You weren't."

She held his gaze as he looked back up, her own still intense, as if there were something she was trying to convey to him without words, but (F/n) couldn't figure out the message. "So...?" He raised a brow, "How did you...?"

"Who were they?" Kinue cut him off.

(F/n) blinked. "Who?"

"The people. In your memories." She said, discreetly.

It took a moment for (F/n) to realize what she meant, and when he did, he felt his face heat as his embarrassment deepened. It seemed Kinue had been hearing what he had experienced as for a couple of months after he got here, and now it seemed that when bad memories haunted his nightmares, she could hear them too. He would definitely need to learn how to control what memories he shared in his sleep by laying flat on his front, and he tried desperately now to clear his mind of anything he wouldn't want Kinue to hear... But there was still the matter of those nightmares she had to wonder.

"It's nothing." He brushed it off, "Nothing you need to worry about."

"They were hurting you, weren't they." She worded as a question, but spoken as a statement.

(F/n) shrugged, "It happens."

"It shouldn't have..." Kinue said, and (F/n) resisted the urge to flinch at the venom that was starting to creep into her voice. "Was that back when you were in the orphanage?"

"Yeah." He finally admitted, "But it's not a big--"

"Who were they?" She demanded.

(F/n) took a deep breath, "Foster parents." When Kinue looked curious, he continued, "Just, people that I was placed with after my parents abandoned me. The city gives people a bit of money to take care of kids who aren't biologically theirs, and, um..." He cleared his throat. "The vetting system isn't all that great. I guess a lot of people sign on for the wrong reasons, or just really shouldn't be trusted with kids, ever." He paused, chewing at his lip, before adding, "I haven't lived with any of them for a while, though. It's fine. I mean, it's whatever. It's over."

Silence rang between them before Kinue let out a sigh, her shoulders sagging as she seemed to deflate. "I'm sorry."

(F/n) raised a brow, "For what?"

Kinue: "I hadn't realized when training you, that you were hurting. I hadn't -- It hadn't occurred to me that there could be danger there too."

(F/n): "I wasn't in danger."

Kinue: "They hurt you."

"Well, I lived, didn't I?" He'd tried to make it sound lighthearted, dismissive, but he didn't think he succeeded. Kinue was giving him a searching, apprehensive look, and (F/n) wasn't sure how he felt about that. "Look... it's really not that big of a deal."

Kinue shook her head, but she dropped her gaze, and (F/n) hoped that meant she was done arguing with him over it. "I'd like to make it up to you." She offered, "The time you spent hurting. I can't undo that, but I can try to make sure it doesn't happen again. I'm not going to ask you to think of me as your mother."

"I think you'll have to earn that." He joked. "After so many I've gone through."

Kinue didn't answer him for a long moment, and when she did, it was just to sigh and laid his head back down. "Go back to sleep, (F/n). We'll talk about this another time, right?"

"I mean, yeah, whenever you feel like listening to my annoying ass." He smiled.

"I tolerate you." She gave a small smirk.

"Nicest thing you ever said to me." He closed his eyes back up and tried to steady his breathing, waiting for Kinue to assume he'd fallen asleep..Instead, she stayed and watched him, and after a couple of minutes, he kindly asked, "You cold?" Kinue said nothing. "I don't mind if you slept next to me. Ain't no twin bed."

She clears her throat before answering, "I... I guess that would be fine. Just for a bit until you're asleep, have to head back to base soon."

"Sure thing." And next thing he knew, Kinue was on the bed beside him, one arm draped over him and her breath at his head. Surprisingly for a cold-blooded woman, she was warm and her arm was like a safeguard, and it should have been so strange because she was essentially a stranger, but somehow it was... Okay to (F/n).

'Last time I held you,' Kinue's mind wandered like it was barely a whisper, 'I could lift you in just one hand. You were so small. And helpless.'

(F/n) and Kinue lay in silence on the bed. She moved her hand up and down, just a little, a soft enough motion to be soothing and not jostle him, and slowly he could feel himself begin to fade back into slumber.

"Goodnight, my son." Kinue smiles.