Tommy: So, this morning, we decide to rob this fat motherfucker, to get all his money, some euros dollars yeniz cHinG cHinG. You know what I'm saying?
Crowd: *listens*
Tommy: We approached this dude, Ilich has this big ass machete and then he says-
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*flashback*
Ilich: *holding knife to his face* Give me your rolex and your wallet!
Alik: oh my god. Knife. So cute.
Ilich: Shut the fuck up and give me your rolex and your wallet motherfucker!
Alik: okay okay *points gun at him* now, suck. My. dick.
Ilich: *scared* jesus, man, easy, this is all just a big misunderstanding
Tommy: *in the background scared*
Alik: you deaf? I said suck my dick or this is the last piece you ever see faggot!
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Tommy: *continues story* then he snatched his piece like a fucking bruce lee *does a punch* Waaa!!! You know what I'm saying?
Crowd: *nods and listens*
Tommy: and then glocks this fuck, right Ilich?
*that's not what happened at all*
Ilich: *spits out water* huh? ..yeah, its true *touches jaw in pain* oh fuck *fixes jaw*
Tommy: ._. ..yeah we did it
Crowd: *silence*
Tommy: *stands there in awkward* *walks away slowly*
YOU ARE READING
AMERICAN RUSSIANS
Humorthis is a story about tommy cash and ilich prusikin of their american russians series on youtube
