Ineffable

Makeout Reef

Azazel was that angel that always made you feel like he knew exactly how to make you feel better. He was like a balm for the worst aches and pains.

And now all anyone cares about is he’s become Fallen.

As far as the higher ups were concerned, they all had the potential to be next.

The Fallings were given the oh so clever moniker in the paperwork, “Hell in Heaven.”

So absurd. Aziraphale thinks bitterly.

Oh and here’s a real shocker: Azazel, Azza and Uzza were in a relationship of three together. Aziraphale didn’t even know that until the memorial.

“And when Azazel approached us saying he’d fallen in love with both of us, and would not be choosing between us.” Azza says first, then Uzza finishes, “We told him of course we wouldn’t dream of making him choose.”

Aziraphale’s eyes go wide, turning to ask Ariel, but she’s already shaking her head, “It’s not like it was important to comment on.”

“Because we had fallen in love with him too.” Uzza starts this time, so Azza finishes, “And so we welcomed him with open arms.”

“Our beloved…” Azza trails off, before both of them say in unison,

“Our beloved was too much for even Heaven’s light.”

In an instant, all the angels cheer, as the two remaining angels hug each other and weep.

It truly was as nice a moment as it could be at the time.

Of course, what none of them knew was,

“We’re suspending Earth seminars.” Gabriel tells Aziraphale afterwards, as they and Michael all sit together.

Michael looks annoyed, like she was hoping to have found a gentler way to broach the subject.

It didn’t matter much, because Aziraphale only cares about one thing, “How long until they’re reinstated?” , looking to both of them for an answer.

He’s met with simultaneously shaking heads, then Gabriel assures Aziraphale, “But we’re going to keep fighting to get you a job in Eden, okay?” So you’ll have a plan once this all stops.”

That does little to comfort Aziraphale, but he still appreciates the effort, enough to say, “Well, now the Archangels can’t say they wish they were us.”

He’d meant it as a joke, but judging by Michael’s smile, it didn't entirely work, as he just says, “You’re right.”

Still later, Aziraphale’s standing in a deserted part of Heaven, waiting for Jophiel to show up, when he hears the telltale sign of fire crackling, and on impulse, he looks around in a panic, scared he’s about to witness Jophiel’s Falling, only for his fears to be proven wrong a moment later when he sees Jophiel approaching with something in his hand, lowered at his side and flaming like anything. 

Aziraphale has no idea what to think, but when the other angel gets closer, the confusion becomes immediately clear, and he just has to roll his eyes at it.

“Oh of course you couldn’t have an ordinary celestial sword, it just had to be a flaming sword!”

Jophiel holds it up, careful to hold it away from them, “It reminded me of a celestial hymn.”

Aziraphale asks, intrigued, “Which one would that be?”

Jophiel laughs, and tries to remind him, “The one about Heaven’s warriors!”

That doesn’t sound quite right, “There’s a celestial hymn about Heaven’s warriors?”

Now Jophiel plays dumb, shrugging with sword in hand, “I suppose you’ll just have to keep spending time with me until you find out!”