Enough

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Viktor x gn!Reader | SFW | wc: 2.2k|

Doubts fill your mind while working on something you were supposed to be passionate about. Thankfully, Viktor knows how to lend you a helping hand when you falls apart.

Warnings: Self-doubt, overthinking, intrusive thoughts because they can be bitches u-u.

A/N: A way to vent this time, I'm sorry. Enjoy <3

The candlelight on the desk faintly filled the lab as it gave you enough brightness to look clearly at the papers you were working on

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The candlelight on the desk faintly filled the lab as it gave you enough brightness to look clearly at the papers you were working on... you were supposed to be working on. Teeth biting the pencil harder than usual, close to breaking it in half as you tried to put your brain to function: an idea, a glimpse of inspiration, any thought that could get you out of that void you had been stuck in for the last week, would be treasured like no other.

Your pencil reached the paper once again, but nothing came out written, just the shadow of a shaking hand peeking through your already clouded eyes.

It made no sense: you had no problem starting projects and finishing them to perfection before, resulting in professors and students from The Academy praising your creativity and hard-working nature, making you feel destined to be there, that you were born for the top, made for success.

Then why were you failing this time?

The pencil dropped to the floor when your breathing got heavier, unsteady, unusual. No, you weren't failing; it was just a miscalculation and horrible timing, a possible burnout that would go away in a few days.

Then why haven't you recovered from that? It's been a few days now. Why were there only meaningless traces on the paper to begin with?

It looked like you made it, not like someone great did, and it drove you to feel worse.

Empty was what everything felt like. The overflowing happiness that you were used to experimenting whenever you sat down to work on these... you couldn't call them just projects, no: they were dreams you vowed to build for yourself and others to enjoy. What happened with that?

What happened to you?

Worthless.

Your lip trembled as tears gathered inside your eyes. Were you about to cry now? You felt vulnerable and judged even when no eyes were trying to pierce through your disguise. No one was around, and maybe that was the problem.

No mask to put on when there was no one to see it.

People say one's real personality shows only when by ourselves, anything else we display turns into nothing but a mask, able to fit into standards and prejudices that please and gratify people who we are forced to seek approval from.

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