The Rose & Her Thorn

Part 40

Over the months, the garden had become their haven. Their friendship bloomed like the wide array of marigolds, jasmines, lotuses, and roses in many hues that the garden boasted.

The soothing fragrance of the new beginnings and had filled their nostrils like the tantalizing fragrance of the nightqueens and the white lilies. For Shikha Singh Rathore, it was nothing less than a miracle to caress her eight-month pregnant belly without looking over her shoulder in the fear of finding a gun trained at her.

"I can't wait to hold him or her! Can't believe the date is less than a month away!" said Shikha, placing her legs over the stool in front of the swing.

Her excitement had rubbed off the otherwise stoic Vikram Singhal. He had imagined his concern for the baby extended from his concern for the mother, but he realized how wrong he had been when he felt the first kick of the baby at one of their dinners together.

He had not expected the warmth to spread to every cell of his, which burst with ecstasy. He had not prepared himself for the burst of surreal emotions in his heart, and the baby had tethered him to itself from that day on.

"I can't wait to see him or her either!"

Shikha beamed at him. The gentle breeze caressed her and tickled her, adding to her excitement to meet her unborn. "You love your child so much that the labor pains don't bother you, do they?" he asked.

"I'm terrified, of course, but I'm sure it will be worth it."

Vikram looked at the crescent surrounded by drifting clouds. The stars glistened against the dark canvas, playing hide and seek with the clouds. His tense muscles had made the turbulence of his mind clear to the woman next to him.

"I cannot wrap my head around how my mother, or Nikita's mother, abandoned us and committed suicide. You... chose your child above your comfort, and they just... left."

Shikha placed her hand over his shoulder and cast a concerned glance in his direction. "I cannot make any sense of that. Why just leave us behind?"

Shikha drew her lips in before she let out an agitated sigh. "I understand how you feel. I remember almost hating Samar for making the choice he made. How could he sacrifice everything we had for what we could have?"

Her voice shook and her fingers over his shoulder blade twitched. "In the end, it is a choice. They made choices we don't see ourselves making, but we are not them. We don't know what went in their mind before they chose that option."

Vikram's jaw clenched, and they stilled for a few tense moments like the still pond in front of them. "Samar wanted the best for his child. There's risk, but it is not bereft of sense. Our mothers just left us to the vultures, because the shame and the taunts terrified them," he said.

"We may not see their reason, Vikram, but do you think anyone will give up on the life if they did not believe in the reason? Fear of death is one of the strongest motivations, and if they overcame that..."

"Don't justify their actions, Shikha!" he said, freeing his shoulder from her clasp with a gentle jerk.

"I'm not justifying, Vikram!" She entwined her fingers with his quivering ones, and her voice dropped by an octave. "If you don't accept their deeds and move on, it would hurt you and no one else. They are gone. It doesn't matter to them. And they can't answer your questions, so why remain in that abyss?"

Vikram's form trembled like a tree in a tempestuous and relentless storm. He stared at the heavens to hold back the tears that threatened to spill out of his eyes. The agony choked him when the vision of the lifeless form on his mother resurfaced.

He felt as powerless as the adolescent he was when it had occurred. His knees had buckled when he had realized his mother had drifted into an eternal slumber and the pain of his kneecaps crashing against the concrete had not even registered after the benumbing revelation.

"Just let go, Vikram, and you will have the peace you craved for. I know you want respite from the quest of searching for the reasons, and the dagger to sever the ties is in your hands," she said, rubbing his biceps with her other hand.

Vikram gave her a curt nod. Almost imperceptible, almost like his acceptance of her words. But it was there. Shikha rested the side of her head against his shoulder and felt the muscles relax under her cheek.

"I think I understand your fear of abandonment and reluctance to celebrate your birthday. They are your battles, and I won't claim to understand the scars they had left behind. But if ever need someone to offer reassurance or... just be there, I'm here," she said.

"And that's because of gratitude, isn't it?" he asked.

A mirthless chuckle accompanied his question and a morose smile danced on her lips. "Gratitude is only one reason on the list, Vikram. The real reason is I care for you and I want to be there for you."

Despite the darkness that shrouded them, Shikha could see his surprised eyes staring back at her in disbelief. The remnants of brine glistened in the sparse light of the waning moon. His smoldering gaze had never failed to make a shudder run down her spine, and that night was no different.

"Strange, isn't it?" Vikram averted his gaze from her and a dark chuckle spilled out of his bowed lips. "The reign of terror came from a place of fear. I was naïve enough to believe that preventing the intermingling of men and women would prevent clandestine affairs that broke my family, but I couldn't be more wrong."

Vikram closed his eyes shut and allowed the memories to flood his tumultuous mind. "When I had gained access to the secrets of the government and the oligarchs through my cybersecurity company, it was easy to monopolize the trade and markets in the state. And what did I use that for? Put my own insecurities to rest!"

"It was a different time, but you identified those shortcomings. And you helped bring down those oligarchs and the mafia bigwigs to justice. It was not all for nothing," she said.

Her compassionate voice and her soothing words offered him the strength to look her in the eye. "I hope so. And thank you. For showing me light, not once, but twice, Shikha."

Vikram mustered the courage to act on the urge that had rattled him from months since they had met again. His lips met her forehead, and much to his surprise, she had not pulled away or pushed him away.

She stayed. Just like she had said. And showed him the light for the third time.