A Fishy End

Chapter 1

Zoey hurried across campus, her backpack bumping against her back. She'd just finished her last final for the year and was on her way to have lunch with her best friend, Sarah. She was distracted and had broken a fine sheen of sweat when she entered the Memorial Union.

The cafe was straight ahead, but Sarah would be coming from the far side of campus. Zoey made for the smaller back hallway to wait for her. She barely noticed the group of boys that flanked her as she turned, until a couple managed to get ahead of her.

"Hey, watch out," she groused as the first one cut her off.

"Fag," one boy muttered.

"What?" Zoey demanded angrily.

She was shoved hard against the wall. "You heard!" one of the boys snarled, pinning her. She struggled to break free.

"We know what you are," the boy continued. "And we don't like your type going to our school, got that?"

"It's not your school," Zoey protested. One of the boys held out a can. Before Zoey could recognise what it was, or react to it coming, the pepper spray caught her in the face. Her eyes burned. She tried to reach for them, but hands were holding hers down. She writhed, her eyes closed, trying to break free.

The first fist caught her in the gut, and she cried out. They were pushing her down the hall, shoving her, striking her, and chanting slur words about her sexuality and gender identity, along with a liberal smattering of words like "freak" and "loser." Her head struck the wall, and she saw stars. She staggered, her heart racing. She was afraid now, on her knees, and one boy kicked her savagely. Do they mean to kill me? It had happened to other trans women.

The assault ended suddenly, to the sounds of feet scattering and to voices. It was Sarah and one of her friends, both shouting for campus security. Zoey's ears were ringing and then the ringing abruptly stopped. She blinked and saw one of the girls held a rape whistle and had been blowing it energetically.

More voices and feet were coming down the hall. Zoey kept blinking, trying to see and make sense of what was going on. Students were crowding down that way, faces filled with concern or curiosity. A few clicked pictures on their phones.

Zoey's face burned, from the pepper spray and from shame. Her attackers were long gone, but she remained, a spectacle for all to see. She bit back bitter tears.

A campus cop was pushing their way through the crowd. Zoey looked up at Sarah's face, her eyes wide and full of trepidation. "Get me out of here," Zoey hissed.

Sarah glanced once at the campus cop, still delayed by the crowds. She nodded and helped Zoey to her feet. They fled.

Back at Sarah's dorm room, an entire crew of their friends, mostly kids from the school's LGBT group, had gathered. "What do you do for pepper spray?" Sarah was asking.

"Use milk," Mike said.

"That's an urban myth," Tina groused.

"It is not."

"Google says..." Sherry was in the corner, reading from her phone. "Huh, Mike is right, milk. Or mild dish detergent. Or Saline."

"Oh!" Sarah squawked. "I've got some contact-lens stuff. That's just saline. Bring it here."

A towel was wrapped around Zoey's neck and saline sprayed liberally in her eyes and across her face. It did feel marginally better. She could keep her eyes open for a short time, though they still burned and itched.

"Maybe you should see a doctor," someone suggested.

"Or make a report," Tina growled. "This was a fucking hate crime! We should protest."

"Protest whom? I didn't know any of the guys."

"One of them was wearing a Theta Sigma T-shirt," Sherry said. "We should totally protest them."

Multiple voices started up, talking about protests and reports and media.

"No!" Zoey barked, bringing the room to silence. "No reports, no protests. God, it's bad enough. I spent all of junior high being the kid who got beat up for being . . ."

"Transgender?" Tina offered.

"Different," Zoey finished. She hadn't been out as transgender until this year. "Always the one being brought in from recess with clothes torn and crying, right in front of all the other kids. As if getting beat up wasn't embarrassing enough, they had to march you right past the lunchroom for everyone to see. I thought I'd outgrown that. Don't make it happen again."

"But what they did," Tina started angrily, but she was shushed by Sarah.

"You heard her. She doesn't want it."

"But," Tina sputtered, "what they did was wrong. If we don't fight, it will happen again."

"And if it happens to one of you," Sarah glared around the room, "then it will be your decision, whether to be the poster child for a protest or not. Leave Zoey out, if that's what she wants." She hugged Zoey's head protectively as she said it.

"Thank you," Zoey whispered to her. The debate was far from over, but Zoey was adamant. She didn't want to further her own embarrassment by going to the campus police, who wouldn't do shit anyway. She didn't want everyone on campus knowing she was, once again, the kid who got beat up for being different. Mostly she didn't want to give the boys the satisfaction of knowing how badly they'd hurt her. It would only make it worse, letting bullies know they had succeeded in their intimidation tactics.

Sarah and Sherry walked her home to her own single dorm room. "You sure you are okay?" Sarah asked at the door.

Zoey nodded. "I will be. Thanks. For saving me, for . . . everything."

Finally alone after a long day, Zoey locked her door, lay on her bed, and dissolved into tears.