camilo x ME??!?

nineteen :|

"how about we go see him now?" dolores suggested.

i looked at her wide-eyed. "no, no, no. i wont even know what to say. and we'll have to talk about what happened and-"

mirabel interrupted me. "we can go together."

i stared at her and sighed. "..fine." i gave in. on one hand, i desperately wanted to talk to him again.. to see him.. to touch him. (NOT IN A CREEPY WAY) but on the other hand, i wanted to avoid him at all costs.

"we can leave whenever youre ready." mirabel told me, holding my hands.

i nodded. "im ready now. or maybe im not. i dont know, i wanna see him so badly but im scared at the same time."

dolores chime din. "it will be fine."

something about her tone of voice really soothed me. it made everything seem okay. i smiled and nodded slightly. i took my hands away from mirabel's softly and stood up. i walked over to my dresser and grabbed my bad off of it.

"lets go." i told the girls sitting on my bed.

we left the house and as soon as we stepped foot outside, i felt a wave of anxiety rush over me. 'why am i doing this? this was a bad idea. what if i say something stupid and literally confess my feelings to him?' so many thoughts ran through my head. i guess i was visibly nervous because dolores rested her hand on my shoulder.

"mirabel and i are right here. you dont need to worry." she reassured me with a smile.

i calmed down and followed the girls to casita. on the walk there, i contemplated my actions from earlier.

'why was i getting so worried over getting friendzoned? ive gotten friendzoned plenty of times. this shouldnt be any different. so what if i like someone and they dont feel the same for me? this has happened many times before, i shouldnt get so worked up.' i concluded that i overreacted earlier.

but all my thoughts changed when we encountered casita. we opened the doors to camilo standing near the stairs, talking to his tia julieta. the moment i got a glimpse of his face, my emotions came pouring out. thankfully, i didnt physically start crying. jeez, that would be embarrassing.

....

JUST KIDDING I WAS CRYING HAHAH. i felt tears escape my eyes. they were coming so fast that i couldnt stop them. they were warm and salty. julieta and camilo noticed my tears and rushed over.

"finnley? are you okay?" camilo asked. i could hear the worry in his voice. that didnt make it any better. hearing his voice made me even sadder. i was basically bawling my eyes out at this point.

"fin? whats the matter, querido?" julieta asked, wiping my tears away with her thumb.

i didnt want to look at anyone, as i had a somewhat ugly crying face. i faced the ground and covered my face. i tried wiping the tears but they just kept coming.

"finnley, i need you to speak to me. are you hurt?" julieta asked.

my breaths were heavy and i could barely get any words out. "ca- cami.." my uncontrollable sobbing prevented me from saying anything at all. i tried saying things but all i could do is make ugly heaving sounds.

dolores and mirabel were holding on to both of my arms, rubbing them up and down to comfort me. i just stood there, wiping my tears that remained falling down my face. my cheeks were warm from both embarrassment and tears. i could see camilo staring at me from the corner of my eye. he had a worried look on his face but he didnt even try to console me.

"come with me, querido." julieta said sweetly, pulling me away.

panic attacks? what are those? haha

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