Hiraeth
(n.) a homesickness for a home to which you cannot return, a home which maybe never was, the nostalgia, the yearning, the grief for the lost places of your past.
Hiraeth is what Marinette felt when she was forced to leave because of Lila's...
"It hurts. It hurts a lot. But I'll keep it to myself so it doesn't Hurt anyone else." -dying-osho-soon
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Song choice: As the world caves in; mat Maltese
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D-0
1:00 am
21 hours left
As I got home, I immediately headed for my sewing machine.
Saying absolutely nothing just flipping through my sketchbook and picking out designs.
"Marinette," I hear Tikki's gentle voice behind me.
I knew what she was about to ask. But, I couldn't and didn't want to talk about what is happening.
"Tikki, can we not, please? I don't have time to waste. So, please, can you just help me." My voice broke with each word.
I felt like crying, yelling, hitting, giving up. I don't want to leave. I want to stay. I want to continue to see Tikki every day. I want to continue to see my parents and friends. I want to see Cha-Adrien. I don't want to miss anything. I want to bake with my parents. I want to go to school. I don't care if I have pressure, I want to stay.
I don't want to leave.
But I can't, I fucked up, and now I have to fix it.
Although I know I have to leave I still don't want to think about it. I don't want to know that I have to leave by the end of the day.
So I have to distract myself. I can't waste time sleeping. I need to make presents for everyone.
I waited for Tikki to say something, afraid if she will continue I will break down.
But finally, one thing was on my side.
"What do you need me to help?" I hear Tikki say.
I look at her, my eyes blurring up a bit.
She was looking up at me with her hand on her head, waiting for me to instruct her what to do, with a smile. But even as she was smiling, her eyes can't lie.
Her eyes look devastated, tears ready to fall at any second.
"Can you please just tell me a story?" I ask. Knowing if both of us won't get distracted we will burst out crying.
She nods immediately, trying not to also cry.
"Um...okay...let me think for a second." Her voice crakes but eventually comes to normal.
I look at her with a smile, as I start planning what I need to do for each design.
Trying my best to ignore the fact that this will probably be the last time Tikki will be telling me stories until I come back.
