Por amor al arte (Julieta x F!Reader)

Part 20

You sighed as you leaned on Isabela to keep from falling to your knees. It was a cleaning day. You had put this aside partly because you didn't want to be separated from Karim and partly because it was simply too painful to see your home burned to the ground. But deadlines are always met and you couldn't shut yourself up in Casita forever (no matter how much Alma y Julieta offered you), you'd have to start over at some point.

You were not stupid, you knew that almost anything could be saved. What was once your home was burned to the ground, the floor and ceiling boards were gone and only worm-eaten bits of furniture remained. Your books, your and Eli's clothes, her wooden toys, and most of your work were gone. There were a few salvageable pieces of the crib, cups, and plates. Karim's house was no better, only some of his field tools were still useful.

You wanted to cry from helplessness, from knowing that everything you had was gone because of the simple whim and hatred of some people to whom you had never done anything.

"We can come back later" Isabela told you, squeezing your shoulder "we don't have to do it today"

"I don't think I have the strength to come back later" you admitted

The girl nodded and gave you a quick sideways hug before parting ways and walking to what was once your home. Every step you took sent a shiver down your spine, pieces of rotten wood crunched under you and you knew you had to hurry or you'd collapse. For a moment you wanted to have Julieta by your side, but you had asked her to stay with Eliza and Karim.

It hurt you a little to see the pain in her eyes and you knew that she felt like when her family had forbidden her to help rebuild Casita, so you quickly assured her that it was only in the morning, after eating, when Pepa would have finished her chores and could take care of Eliza, you would take her. The brunette had given you a small smile, accepting the deal. You didn't mean for her to feel like you were letting her down, but you'd also be lying if you said you weren't trying to put some distance between you.

Not much, because you knew deep down that you could never stay away from her, but you needed to collect your thoughts about her. You missed the moments when your heart didn't want to jump out of your chest for only listening to her voice, or when her cakes and sweets aroma brought you comfort instead of intoxicating and seducing you. You missed being able to joke with her, hold her hand, hug her and kiss her cheeks for the simple fact of enjoying her presence, without your mind wandering to darker places.

But you couldn't go back, you had crossed a line that you didn't know was there and now you had to live with it. The problem was that every day it was more difficult to be with her as a friend, especially when there was a dream engraved in your mind. A few nights ago, you had dreamed of a pair of soft lips brushing against yours, in a kiss that wasn't really a kiss. And you had blushed the next day when your treacherous mind wished they were Julieta's.

"Damn, did you have to steal my heart, Juli?" you thought while you dug between the earth and the ash.

You were so lost in your thoughts about her, that you didn't even realize that her three daughters were gathered in the ruins of your brother's house, while the oldest was holding something against her chest.

__________________________

Finding something in all this mess would be difficult and everyone knew it, it was more than anything an effort to help you find comfort or resignation. A little push to close a chapter in your life and open another in which everyone hoped they could fit. However, finding a notebook under the boards that she assumed used to be your brother's bed was not something that Isabela expected.

The notebook had scorched edges and was folded due to the moisture from the rain Pepa had put out the fire with, but other than that, it was in a relatively good state and Karim's doodles were still understandable on some of the pages. The girl had been about to call you to give it to you when a word caught her attention: Julieta.