Hidden Fame

Who Needs Consequences?!

When I woke up with a headache, I found myself in an odd position on my bed, but at least I had finished all of my homework(even if some of it was in crayon for some reason).  Standing up, dozens of little balls fell off of me.  They were--Nerds?  Oh, great.... this isn't the first time that this has happened.  One, two, and there my mom's scream is.  I didn't yet know what I had done, but I knew that i was in trouble regardless.  Once I eat too much sugar, bad stuff happens.  Last time, I woke up floating on a raft in somebody else's pool, and apparently I had stolen someone's cow.   That took a while to clean up, but there are perks of being outrageously famous.  No one cares what  you do, because you're some kind of other 'untouchable' species.  When a celebrity commits a crime, it's not thought of as wrong, people just assume that you got drunk at a club and nobody gives it a second thought.

AS I walked down the stairs, I couldn't help but burst into laughter at the scene unfolding in front of me.  My mother was trying to untie Nathan from the bike locks he had been chained up in a chair with.Toilet paper draped from every chair, table, and chandelier; Nerds were scattered all over the ground.  I had also taken a soap dispenser and emptied its contents: onto our beige carpet that was now stained a sugary pink.

My mom was practically in hysterics, and I could see the steam coming out of her ears.  I could tell that I wouldn't be getting off as easy as I had last time.  This punishment was going to consist of  more than just cleaning up my mess, which in itself was already hard enough!

"Young lady!?" she yelled.  "Come unlock your brother right now, and then you're going to go to school," she growled.  "I will deal with you after you return home."  With that, she stormed angrily out of the room.  

I chucked humorlessly as I began to untie Nathan.  After several tries I managed to untie the bike lock, and when it finally released, I ran for my life.  Nathan often became quite violent when he was mad or provoked.  

As if to prove my point, Nathan let out a scream, and I found myself under his heavy body in a moment.  This definitely wasn't the first time that he had gotten mad at me, and things never seemed to turn out right for me in the end.  It wasn't like I ever did anything to annoy him on purpose: I had been under the influence of sugar, so I wasn't allowed to be blamed for everything I did.  Blame the government(easiest way to get rid of a problem)!

Now, how was I going to get out of this situation?  My mom wouldn't care, that was for sure.  So only one option remained: use bribery.  Now this was quite simple, as I was obviously super rich, and I could promise him whatever fantasy boat, car, or celebrity meeting he currently longed for.  I groaned mentally, but my face remained calm. What was it going to be this time?  A flamingo?  A few weeks ago he had asked for a capybara, but I told him that it was probably illegal to own a capybara as a pet, so he settled on a personalized signature from Beyonce.  My brother's most definitely... unique.

"So what'll it be this time, business partner?  I know you've had your eye on that new video game consol, wasn't it the xbox or playstation or something or other?  I know it hasn't come out yet, but trust me, I know people," I said as slyly as I could, adding a wink to the end.  

Instead of the expected agreement, Nathan began chuckling evilly.  "Oh, no  This time, my beloved sister, I am afraid that it will take more than that.  No, no, this time, you are going to do something else for me.  I want you to...." here he paused, cackling like a witch.  "I am going to make you--let me think here--somehow get the most popular boy in school to date you: while you're still Nerdy Nancy."

Fear shot through my body; I know who this meant.  "Damien."  Both Nathan and I stated the name at the same time.  He looked shocked, as confusion replaced the smug look which had formerly been on his face.  Though I would normally revel in these moments, I was horrified by what I had to do.

"You know he hates me, Nate.  How in the world am I going to get him to talk to me, much rather date me?" I asked, hoping that he would realize how stupid his plan was.  Maybe he would withdraw and ask for something like a couple twenties in cash instead.

"No, it's not impossible at all.  I'm going to his party Friday night.  I'll simply dare him to go on a date with the nerdiest, ugliest girl in school: you.  All you have to do is make sure he goes on two more dates.  Then you'll be free from this."

"Oh, well thanks for that.  I hate you, too."  I replied sarcastically, brushing off my ICEE Bear fuzzy pants that I wear as pjs.  Now he seemed to think that I had accepted his little challenge, so he set me free to go prepare myself for the day.  

Today, I decided to wear my contacts instead of the prescription glasses.  Then if some bully knocked them off I could still see.  I simply slid some fake nerd glasses that "cool" people normally wear onto my face.  However, after administering a heavy dose of duct tape, they looked satisfyingly geeeky.  Clothes followed this pattern as well as I ripped up designer clothes and re-sewed ugliness on to them.

I selected a random shirt and threw it on.  It had a kitty on it saying something cheesy using 'meow' or something.  As it was warm outside for fall, I decided to wear a long skirt instead of pants (nothing form-fitting, of course).

Grabbing my carpet-bag-esque backpack, I ran downstairs.  Seeing as Hirimoshi was busy making something for Nathan, I just grabbed a bagel and cream cheese, an orange, and a bottle of iced coffee from our massive silver fridge.  After walking out under our chandeliered front door, I yelled over my shoulder to Nathan.  

"I'm the first one out today: I get to drive!"  I heard his complaints from behind me as he hurried to catch up and possibly outrace me.  I jogged over to the adjacent garage (much easier to do now that I wear tennis shoes daily instead of stilettos) and grabbed the keys to my favorite car: the neon pink convertible Barbie mobile.  I had decided that it was time to humiliate Nathan.  After all, now that he was in the 'cool crowd' he would need a dose of humility, and now he had a reputation that I could tear down.

When Nathan caught up, he saw me leaning on my baby and instantly groaned.  He had never liked this car, but that was before he had a reputation to hold up.  Now this car was going to make his life miserable.  Popular jocks didn't show up to school in a neon pink car with his geeky sister driving.  No, popular jocks were supposed to drive a blue or red sports car, with a cute girlfriend sitting next to them (whichever girl's the most popular cheerleader at the moment) and wearing all brand names, even though everyone else acts like they don't notice any of it.  So, most days, Nathan is the stereotypical popular.  Today, however, was my day to shine, even if I had to be a geek while doing it.  I was quite a good actress, as I am sure that you know by now, so I decided to put on a show when we arrived at school.