Only A Shadow

Chapter Eleven

The rest of the day seemed grey. Nothing seemed fun. Perhaps I was being pouty because of the disciplining my parents gave me. But it seemed unfair. Just because I don't want to become a Christian-no. Rephrase. Just because I don't need to become a Christian doesn't mean I shouldn't go on the mission. Sure, maybe I was being a little sassy. But what's wrong with that? Sassiness is fun. That was what I was brooding upon throughout the day. Mr. Lajos had to keep bringing my attention back from "la-la land" several times during Karate practice. During break time I didn't feel like studying any spy books Mr. Jorgenson had given me to read.

Finally, after a long day I entered my room and laid the black backpack I had recieved which was heavy with books next to my bed and faceplanted onto the soft comforter. Admit it, we all have had those days. I breathed out heavily and decided to run a bath. We had a trip, a field trip you could call it, out in some jungle I didn't remember what it was called with dirt, briars, etc. I wanted to just relax and think, my favorite hobby.

I ran some hot bath water, locked my door and glided into the clear water. It felt incredible. As I scrubbed my body with the lavendar soap I found in the white cabinet under the sink, I though about the unreal adventure I had leading up to this moment. It seemed so different. One moment I was the shy student: Artemis, daughter of a nurse and archeologist, and the next I'm Artemis, a training agent, daughter of two secret spies! What confused me, however, was that I had everything I could have possibly ever wanted, and yet I felt like something was missing. What was it? Love, freinds, a boyfriend, confidence, I didn't know. But I knew I didn't have any of those things.

After an hour of deep thinking, I got out of the now lukewarm bathwater and wrapped myself in a lime green towel. I looked in the mirror at my skinny figure and stringy, red, water soaked hair and was unsure of who I was. I liked to think I was strong, smart, and good looking but there was that small degrading voice inside my head that told me I was weak. That I was unintelligent and ugly. It left me in tears when I was younger but now I grew calloused to it. Maybe I even accepted it. At times, I simply had to push that pain back and move on with my day to day life.

I brushed my teeth, got into black sweat pants and a white T-shirt with the image of a kitten wearing black sunglasses. I grabbed my bookbag and began to read while I brushed out my tangled hair but the words seemed to have no meaning to me. I would read a chapter and not even comprehend what it was about. I glanced aroudn my room in boredom and my eyes caught a glance of the Bible. To my surprise, a note was placed on the leather front cover. It was from my mom. I crawled over my bed and grabbed the thick book and pealed off the yellow sticky note.

Artemis,

I know things haven't been the greatest between us,

But I wanted you to know that this Book is the best book

You will ever read. It has adventure, romance, battle

Scenes and even a few spies here and there. I hope you

Enjoy it.

Affectionatly, Mom

I sighed. I had a feeling this was another mouthful of Jesus she wanted to force upon me, but I flipped through to where the maroon ribbon bookmark was placed: Romans chapter eight. I skimmed through it, but at the end verse thirty-seven and thierty-eight was highlighted in pink. It read, "For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." I pondered, Is this some sort of sign? I wonder... I continued reading suspiciously until my eyelids slowly got heavier and heavier.

(c) doveseyes 2015