Petunia and the Little Monster

September, 1971

She received her reply two days later. The big horned owl was waiting outside her window when Petunia got home from school and all thoughts of homework vanished from her head. Its round, orange eyes followed Petunia while she put down her book bag and went forward to open the window.

She had checked the forest yesterday but had been unable to find the little monster which made her slightly worried. Of course it could just be hiding, but what was she supposed to do if it had actually left? Hoping for some more information, she unfolded the letter.

Hey Petals,

As long as you don't stuff him until he's too fat to fly, I don't mind if you feed Krampus.

Did you only see one of them? Thestrals live in herds, so encountering them alone is quite unusual.

By the way, looking thin and creepy is normal for them, no need to worry.

Gene

Petals? Petunia felt her nose crinkle in aversion. It was true that she didn't like her name but no one had ever given her such an absurd nickname. Tuney or Tunes were what it was usually shortened to - not that she would have reacted any better if the boy suddenly addressed his letter with 'Hey Tunes'.

Trying to focus on the important bits of the letter, she sat down to reply.

To Eugene Scamander,

Please refrain from calling me 'Petals'.

I'm sure the Thestral is alone, I've seen it multiple times and there was never another around. Could this be the reason it's not well?

As long as your bird doesn't peck me, I won't overfed him,

Petunia Evans

❀

Hey Petals,

I'll stop as soon as you stop addressing me with 'Eugene Scamander'.

If it's truly alone it is either too old, sickly or injured to fly with the herd and was left behind. Did you notice any injuries? If not, it might seem unwell because it is lonely.

If he pecks you, I'm sure it'll do less damage than the monster book,

Gene

Petunia's mind focused on one phrase out of the whole letter: left behind.

An image of Severus and Lily flashed through her mind, both of them looking at her while she was standing on the outside. Dumbledore's rejection echoed in her mind, the words she couldn't forget, telling her she would never be special. Always alone.

There was no-one on her side and she didn't belong in Lily's new world. She was left behind while her little sister went on to have magical adventures with other magical people, people who suited her better. Kind and special people, not jealous and boring ones like Petunia.

The little monster was left behind ... just like her.

It was lonely ... just like her.

Even though she had never wanted to admit it to herself, deep down Petunia knew that this was the truth. She had been left behind because she wasn't good enough. She was alone not by choice but because no one wanted her.

Petunia didn't know how long she simply sat there and stared at the letter when a hoot startled her from her thoughts. Looking up she found herself the focus of intense glowing eyes.

She might be all alone, but she had somehow managed to find answers anyhow. There was someone who had been willing to talk and write to her, willing to help her, no matter how unreal the thought felt to her.

"You're waiting for a reply?"

The owl hooted again. Feeling a strange calm descend on her, Petunia penned a quick note with none of her usual care and secured it on the bird's leg.

Eugene, thank you for taking the time to reply. Your bird is quite intelligent and deserves his treats.

If he pecks out my eyes, I'm suing you still,

Petunia

❀

She found the little monster in the gap between two roots, nestled against a mossy tree trunk. It looked fragile and alone, as if it would simply disappear once Petunia took her eyes off it.

Petunia felt ... lost. Truthfully, she had only bothered about the little monster because its existence meant that her own existence was special. Even when Petunia had been determined to find out more about it, it hadn't been so she could understand and care for it - she only wanted to know if it would be dangerous for her to approach it. She wanted reaffirmation that she was unique. Even when she first saw its spindly appearance she hadn't felt pity or wondered why it was so thin. She had simply thought it looked creepy.

Her whole motivation had been selfish and possessive. She hadn't wanted to tell anyone about it, even if it might have endangered it. She had wanted to approach the little monster for herself, always wanting to see it to reassure herself that there was something special about her.

When she looked at it now ... she didn't feel special. She felt wretched.

This was still a life. Petunia was always resentful about how people treated her, but the way she behaved was even worse.

Slowly lowering herself to the ground, she said. "I'm sorry."

It might have been the first time in her life she apologised by her own accord.

The little monster twitched in response to her voice, slowly lifting its head. Its already dull eyes looked even more lifeless than usual.

Petunia's throat was tight. She had never apologised sincerely and didn't know what else to say.

"I'll take care of you, okay? Truly. And I won't let you be alone again."

She knew that the little monster couldn't understand her, but the words were more for herself anyway. A promise she intended to keep. Steeling her resolve, she ignored its corpse-like appearance and horrifying teeth and slowly approached it.

The little monster only reacted when her shaking fingers hesitantly touched its skin, which felt slippery and cold. The little monster clacked its teeth at her and Petunia did her best not to flinch away.

Her voice sounded hoarse to her own ears. "It's okay, I don't want to hurt you. You're very cold, it must be uncomfortable."

Slowly unwinding the scarf from her neck she carefully draped the blue wool over its thin body. The little monster twitched its hooves as if it was thinking of kicking the scarf away, but let it be in the end.

Sitting down, she tried not to shiver. The sun would go down soon, but she didn't want to leave yet. Not because she liked feeling special, but because she was worried.

"I'll bring some food next time. You like ham, right? I also have canned sausages at home. They're sometimes served with breakfast, but I don't especially like them."

The little monster seemed to listen to her voice, slowly lowering its head and relaxing. Petunia kept talking until she ran out of things to say, the sky turning dark. Her mother scolded her when she finally went home, shivering with cold.

The next day she kept her promise, going into the forest as soon as school was over. She found the little monster where she had left it, still covered by her scarf. Petunia fed it a few sausages and brought more the next day.

Three days later, she saw the little monster at the edge of the forest, waiting for her.

Ten days later, it followed her home.

❀