Left Behind

Chapter 6: 2010

"Fuck!" Corey yelled through tears.

He just got off the phone with Shawn from Slipknot, and i could tell something was seriously wrong.

"Corey, what happened baby?" I asked, nervousness thick in my tone.

"Everything is going fucking wrong. This world just wants me to fucking die. I don't fucking understand this fucking life. Why cant life get any fucking easier." He screamed.

I got up to where he was and saw him bent down on the counter with his elbows supporting his head. His phone next to him. I walked up behind him and wrapped my arm around him and kissed his cheek.

"What happened honey?" I asked. Trying to stay calm.

"P-Paul died. He overdosed." He said. Closing his eyes hard and slamming his head down into my shoulder. I wrapped my arms around him as he cried hysterically.

I held him as he cried. I had no idea what to do. I didn't know what to say.

"I can't fucking do it babe." He said through tears.

"Baby, yes you can. Please don't give up now. Live for me, your family, and Paul. He would want you to be happy, he wouldn't want you to make the same mistake he did." I said.

"I can't-" I pressed my finger to his lips before he could finish. I pushed his head and into my shoulder and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Shhh baby. You're okay. I love you honey. Please, stay with me. I love you so so much. And i really wish you knew how much i love you." I said. "Because i really do."

"I'm sorry." He cried.

"It's okay baby. Calm down. I love you." I said as he started to calm down.

"Thank you for always being here, i love you." Corey states.

"No problem, you should feel just as loved as you make me feel." I said.

Corey smiles and lets go of my hand. I place a hand on the back of his shoulder and slide it down to his lower back. I could feel him smiling, that perfect smile and his ice blue eyes looking at me. The thought of him dying made me feel weak with emotion. I just can't have him go.

"Corey, Corey!" I called out.

"Hm?" I heard him say with a deep voice.

"Please." I said.

"What?" He questioned.

"Please don't die. Please. I can't loose you. Please." I begged.

"I won't go. I promise. I wouldn't hurt you like that." He reassured.

"Okay. I love you." I said.

"I love you more." He said.

His soft smile appeared on his face and i kissed him slowly. His hands found their way onto my hips and held me there. I pulled away and stared into his blue eyes.

"I love you." He muttered.

"I love you too, Corey." I said, kissing him on the lips quickly.

•••
2 Months Later

Corey and I have been dating for a long time at this point, and things were pretty rocky between us. We were past the point of no return. Following Paul's death, along with stress of tour without him, on top of other problems, our relationship was ruined. We didn't hate each other, we were just out of our minds.

"Corey, we have to talk." I said.

Corey walked towards me as if he knew what I was going to tell him.

"I think we should.. break up." I said, trying not to breakdown.

Never in a million years did I think those words would think those words would come out of my mouth.

"I agree." He says plainly. "I don't think we are really as meant to be as we thought."

"Yeah. I'm sorry." I said as I started crying.

"Shhh. It's okay baby." He said, wrapping me in a hug. "We've done too much damage to each other."

He was completely correct. We have done too much damage. Breaking up was our only option.

"Can you kiss me one last time? Love me for one more second? Please?" I said.

"Of course." He said, pressing his soft, warm lips onto mine, his hair, short but long enough to feel, his beard short and growing back glowing as he kissed me like he's never before. One thing lead to another, and we were making out. His tongue finding its way to my mouth, which i gladly granted access. My hand pressed the back of his head as i pushed my face into him. He pulled away from me just enough for him to look deep into me, i felt his warm breath tease my lips.

"Fuck. I got a little too wild with that one." He
laughed and I slid my hand down his neck.

"I love you, even if we're not together, I'll always love you with all my heart, Corey." I said. "I think the best thing for you right now is to take a break, find yourself and maybe one day we'll come back to this. Thank you for everything you have done for me, the opportunities you have given me. I'm always going to be here for you if you ever have to talk to me about anything."

"I'm still going to be here for you too, you are probably the best girlfriend I've ever had in my life and it's honestly a privilege to know you, I'm sorry our relationship didn't work as planned but.. it happens, ya' know? I love you so much." He said as he kissed me one last time. "I think Jim would be a better fit for you."

"One more kiss?" I asked.

He pushed his soft lips onto mine and pulled away. "I love you."

"I love you too."