Rekindling

Chapter 5 - Gray

I really don't want to be here.

It makes me feel like I'm a criminal.

Looking around the sparsely furnished room, that previous sense of claustrophobia takes hold of me once again. It hit me the first time when the kind lady, who showed us in here, left to grab the drinks we asked her for. I wasn't even thirsty then, but she offered them so nicely that I felt like we couldn't really decline.

Now, my mouth is dry and my throat is burning and I cannot wait for her to bring me that water.

The silence in the room is almost suffocating, too. Although I don't feel like chit-chatting about random things, I might just start a conversation with Jordan only to get rid of this deafening silence. It feels awkward and uncomfortable and if that door wasn't closed behind me, I would consider running far away from this depressing place.

Actually, I have no idea if the door is simply shut or if it is locked. My over-imaginative mind, however, is adamant that I heard the turn of a key when the nice lady left. But surely, since we are obviously not criminals, I am just making this up. It must be against the law to lock people in while they are waiting for someone, even if this is a police station.

My thoughts wander back to when Alex took me to his workplace for Future Day last year. That was the first time I had actually ever been inside a police station. And although it doesn't hold the best memories because of what it triggered after I had a look at our birth records, I am convinced that his workplace was way less intimidating.

Their meeting rooms had windows, at least. The one where we were offered donuts and where Finn and Alex met the first time overlooked a square bustling with people and activity. In here, all I can see when lifting my head from the table are dull, gray concrete walls.

I wonder how Finn is doing.

I feel a smile tugging at the corners of my lips just thinking of him. He must still be stuck on that awful RV vacation with his bio dad and his family. I haven't heard from him all week, so I assume that he was right and they did choose to go somewhere with no cell phone service. Or he has done something to get his phone taken away as a punishment. Wouldn't be the first time, either.

"Here you go, darling," a voice sounds, almost making me jump out of my skin.

Instantly, a hand lands on my shoulder, patting it comfortingly.

"You okay there, kiddo?"

I first glance at the bottle of water that the nice lady must have placed on the table in front of me and then to my left, where Jordan sits. He is looking at me with an unreadable expression. The kind he has been wearing ever since we left the car and stepped into the police building. I stare at him for a few seconds and finally, his features soften slightly and he offers me a small, encouraging smile.

"Spacing off again, I see," he mutters, more to himself than anyone else.

"Chief Johnson wants me to let you know that they'll be with you shortly," the woman, who looks really pretty and has the kindest eyes that resemble liquid chocolate, explains.

Instantly, Jordan's weird expression is back on his face as he turns to look at her.

"Thank you," he says, sounding very businesslike.

Not at all like the guy who normally flirts with any female that crosses his path, no matter how old or what type she is. If she is even remotely pretty, my brother automatically turns on his charm, like he can't help himself. It is very unusual to see him acting so cool, almost disengaged.

Maybe it is because of what happened. It would make sense that the shock of Sam's accident makes us all act differently. It is kind of the same with me, I guess. I am probably not acting like myself, either. Although I am trying very hard to keep my composure in order to spare my family from having to deal with me crying all the time, it is an impossible feat. Somebody just needs to look at me the wrong way and I am ready to burst into tears.