Suicide

The Mysterious Woman

LINLEY
Busty Kathy!

WOODS
Who is that?

LINLEY
That's Mary Ann's porn alias!

WOODS
That can't be? Are you sure?

LINLEY
Yes!

WOODS
I knew I had seen her somewhere!

LINLEY
You are disgusting!

WOODS
Well, one needs to get inputs from somewhere!

LINLEY
Spare me your stupid explanations!

WOODS
But why? Kathy didn't need the money!

LINLEY
I talked to Patricia Watts also known as Anne Wild.
Patricia was deeply moved by Kathy's suicide:
- How? Why? When I got the news I couldn't think. We are in this business, somehow one expects that this could happen. We feel that one day one of us will snap.

WOODS
Did Patricia know Kathy well?

LINLEY
Patricia knew that Mary Ann was married. This means Mary Ann must have trusted her.
- Mary Ann talked about David. She wanted to leave him. She said to me: "The marriage has lost its purpose!"

WOODS
What was the purpose of marriage for 
Mary Ann?

LINLEY
I think for Mary Ann was marriage a bond between man and wife solely to raise children.

WOODS
So, Mary Ann or Busty Kathy didn't think that she was cheating on her husband?

LINLEY
Patricia told me:
- I wasn't fine with Mary Ann cheating on her husband. I told her, but she waved it off. It is a different kind of partnership we have here in the porn industry. Mary Ann found a loving husband, but she didn't appreciate it.

WOODS
Why did Mary Ann feel the need to do porn?

LINLEY
Patricia explained:
- A lot of women say that they are doing it for the money, but we all know that's not the case. If a woman wants money she could take the streets. She would be more anonymous. Porn is about being an adult actress, about the thrill and excitement of performing in front of the camera.

WOODS
Okay? But how can one live two lives?

LINLEY
Mary Ann probably never loved David. She was probably devastated that she couldn't have children and she probably felt inferior and feminine, therefore, she need attention and the limelight where she could prove to herself and the world that she is a woman and men crave and want to see her naked and have sex with her.

WOODS
But we assume that Mary Ann's social media profile did not give any indication that she was a narcissistic or suffered from a narcissistic personality disorder.

LINLEY
This is true. I don't think that Mary Ann was a true narcissist. Alright, she was beautiful and she knew that she was beautiful, but many people in school and around her reported that she was down-to-earth and easy-going. But things changed when she couldn't have children. She felt diminished and not woman enough and therefore she probably need to be in the limelight, not as an ordinary actress or a woman, but as an attractive, erotic woman.

WOODS
I just can't wrap my head around why an attractive woman like Mary Ann went down that path.

LINLEY
It's the same with men. When men receive the diagnosis that they cannot father a child, they don't feel like a masculine man because being a potent man comes with the notion that one must be able to father many children.

WOODS
But have you considered that diabetes played a role in why Mary Ann probably needed additional sexual arousal?

LINLEY
Additional sexual arousal?

WOODS
Yeah. Think about it, Mary Ann had diabetes like many people. She couldn't eat candy, or at least not in the unhealthy amount average non-diabetics consume.

LINLEY
Yeah, but what has that to do with sexual arousal?

WOODS
I'll get there! Think about sweets. If you eat a lot of sweets, despite they are unhealthy, you feel pleasure. That's why many people eat sweets in winter and when they are sad.

LINLEY
Why do people eat a lot of candy in winter?

WOODS
Because of the missing sunlight. The sun is an important source for growth, and photosynthesis, not only for plants but as well as for humans. In winter in the northern hemisphere, we get less sunlight. Winter is cold and dark and therefore we feel depressed and mostly eat sweets to uplift us.

LINLEY
Yeah.

WOODS
Now, imagine a diabetic who cannot eat a lot of sweets to uplift herself. She feels depressed and downcast. And then it appears to her that she can derive pleasure through her body. Sexual arousal and sexual intercourse seem to be a supplement for the pleasure normal people get through eating sweet food.

LINLEY
That's far-fetched!

WOODS
It maybe is, but I thought about it a great deal and I think that my hypothesis is backed up by the fact that many female pornstars have diabetes.

LINLEY
How many female pornstars have diabetes?

WOODS
I don't know the exact number.

LINLEY
Then it's a mere assumption.

WOODS
Maybe, but if Mary Ann needed to do porn to uplift herself, why did she kill herself?

LINLEY
I asked Patricia whether she noticed a change in Mary Ann's behavior. Patricia responded:
- Everything seemed to be fine. We were talking about doing this business for a couple of years. That's the general narrative and then we would take the money and do something different. We all said at one point or another that we are fed up with men and that we never wanna be around men again.
But then one day Mary Ann was changed. I hadn't seen her like this. She was troubled and absent-minded. I asked her what was wrong but she didn't respond.
I thought someone had found out about her double life. This happens, girls think they can keep everything secret, but then it comes all to light, their families find out about it, chide them, insult them, avoid and ban them. These are hard times for every girl. Mary Ann was tearful. I tried to help her, but she wouldn't let me.
Then after a porn shooting, a young woman came into the studio. She wanted to talk with Mary Ann. We don't get any visitors. We keep the places we shoot secret. I scrutinized that young woman and thought that she must be Mary Ann's sister or relative. She was worried about Mary Ann, I could see that.

WOODS
Who was this woman?

LINLEY
Patricia doesn't know, she didn't talk to her. Patricia described me the young woman, but her description doesn't fit anyone we come across so far. Patricia told me:
- I saw that this woman talked to Troy for a while, but then Mary Ann rushed to her and dragged her outside.

WOODS
We need to talk to Troy Gallen!

LINLEY
I will!