Bungou Stray Dogs Lemon (ships)

4~ I know who you pretend I am

~I know who you pretend I am~

🃏Ship- Shin Soukoku

🎴Summary: Dazai takes Akutagawa out to drink but regrets it when the younger expresses his feelings in a drunken state. Feeling bad that he can't return his feelings he sends Akutagawa home but makes sure Atsushi takes care of him.

🀄️Contains; Drinking, smut, drunk sex, heartbreak and bad ending.

📝Word count • 2400 •

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Akutagawa hiccup. A tear rolled down his face and the hand holding his squeeze tighter. Akutagawa didn't want to let go. Despite being in a wasted mindset he still refused to let go in fear this hand will never hold his again. In fear he lost everything this night because his heart decided to stand up for itself. Stand up and express the very feelings that make him weak, the feelings he hates for having but can't get rid of, these feelings, for Dazai.

"I think you've had enough Akutagawa let's take you home"

The younger widen his eyes.

"Dazai, please answer me"
"I c-can't go home without having an answer"

"Akutagawa you're drunk, even if I say anything you won't remember it"

"I don't care just please I need to hear it"

Dazai sighed. He held a serious expression on his face. He didn't want to be fully blunt, especially when the younger won't even remember, but he also knew that Akutagawa needed to know the truth.

"I can tell you what ever it is you wish to know when you are sober"

"B-but my sober state won't allow me to approach you like this again"
"I want to take advantage of this opportunity"

Dazai knew he was right.

"Fine come here"

Akutagawa perked up. Not fully understanding what the older meant, the younger stood up and sat on Dazai's lap. The older widen his eyes but didn't make an attempt to get him off. He was going to let Akutagawa have his moment before he dropped the bomb on him.

Akutagawa wrapped his arms around Dazai's neck and straddled his lap. He put his forhead on the others and drunkly smiled. Dazai sighed. He held Akutagawa by his waist so he wouldn't fall.

"Are you sure you're ready for what I'm about to say?"

The younger nodded.

Dazai put his emotionless face back on and spoke with a serious tone.

"I'm in love with someone else"

Akutagawa froze. He didn't want to move, breath, or even live at the moment. He didn't want to accept the reality of Dazai's feelings.

"Why?"

Dazai chuckled.

"Because he's everything I want in a man. He might be a pain in the ass but I still will not hesitate to take him out if he gave me a chance"

"I am giving you a chance Dazai"

"Heh I'm not taking about you Akutagawa"

"Why?"

"Because you aren't Chuuya"

Akutagawa shoot his head back. He took his hands and put them on Dazai's face holding in a tear.

"Dazai will you ever give me a chance?"
"Please tell me Dazai I can't live without knowing the truth"
"Dazai"

The older also grabbed one of Akutagawa's cheek. He started to lean in and look the younger straight in the eyes. He looked at the younger lips then went back up to look at his eyes. The younger swore his heart was skipping multiple beats. Dazai wasted no time and connected his lips with the younger. Akutagawa closed his eyes and melted into the kiss putting his hands back around Dazai's neck. The kiss didn't last long only a couple minutes at max, and then Dazai pulled away.