Hold Me Down

Chapter 13

The truth comes tumbling from Emily's lips in a series of broken sentences and incoherent muttering. Her mouth moves rapidly, as if it's trying to outrun the shame creeping up her cheeks. She spits it all out without preamble: A's text, the threats to tell their friends, the recording.

Alison absorbs her words as if they're blows, her breath hitching as she spreads her palms flat on the Hastings' kitchen island to steady herself. Her eyes widen almost imperceptibly with every horrifying detail Emily divulges.

Spencer listens on silently, her face full of compassion that Emily knows is not for her.

"What do you mean A recorded us?" Alison asks once Emily stops talking. Her voice rises in panic as she seeks to clarify Emily's nervous babbling. "Recorded us doing what?"

Emily pales at the question, reluctant to add to the blonde's growing distress. She knows Alison heard everything she said but is likely having a difficult time wrapping her head around it all. She shakes her head and snaps her mouth shut. She's already said so much, she can't bring herself to say anymore.

Spencer clears her throat awkwardly and knowingly steps in. "Apparently A—or, well, Charles, I suppose—now has a recording of an intimate moment between you two and he's been using it to threaten Emily."

Emily hears Alison gasp, her hand flying up to cover her mouth. She pushes her chair back and jumps to her feet. "There's a recording of...that? And you have it?"

Emily nods guiltily. "He sent it to me."

"Why? Why would he do that?" Alison asks, sounding betrayed. As the blonde tries in vain to shake the emotion from her voice, Emily wonders who Alison feels more betrayed by: the trusted friend who inflicted the pain or the unknown brother who exploited it.

"He wanted me to tell Spencer, Hanna and Aria about what happened between us."

Alison's eyes nearly pop from her head. "Did you?!"

Emily shakes her head. "No. Not yet. Spencer figured it out on her own, but I'm going to tell Hanna and Aria today."

"You can't do that!" Alison cries urgently, looking to Spencer for support.

"Trust me, I don't want to. But Charles..." Emily starts only to be interrupted.

"I want to hear it," Alison cuts in decidedly.

Emily opens her mouth to protest but Spencer beats her to the punch. "Ali, no."

But Alison is undeterred, her voice hardening as she ignores Spencer and narrows her eyes on Emily. "Play it. I want to hear it."

"Alison, I don't know if that's the best idea. You're only going to upset yourself," Spencer argues, shifting uncomfortably in her seat as she tries to reason with the emotional blonde.

"Upset myself?" Alison scoffs. "I think I'm way past upset, Spencer." She turns back to Emily, her eyes ice cold and her voice clipped. "Now, play it. I want to hear."

"Ali, don't do this," Emily pleads, finally finding her voice.

"I said play it! It's me on that tape, I deserve to hear it!" Alison screeches as tears prick at her eyes and her fists clench at her sides.

Emily flinches at the loudness of Alison's voice. With a defeated glance towards Spencer, she pulls her phone from her back pocket and taps the screen a few times before handing it over to Alison. She closes her eyes and waits, letting her tears fall freely onto the granite countertop.

She remembers what it felt like to hear that recoding for the first time, like someone had plunged a knife directly into her heart and left it there. She can still hear Alison's desperate pleas crisp and clear in her mind. She doesn't think she'll ever be able to forget them. And now Alison is going to have to live with that same feeling and those same voices permanently embedded in her brain. Except it'll be so much worse for Alison. It seems like all Emily's done lately is cause the blonde pain, unimaginable pain, and she hates herself for it.