Hold Me Down

Chapter 16

Alison can feel him hard against her thigh as he hovers over her, trailing his mouth from her jaw to her neck and then down to her chest as she stares at the ceiling over his shoulder. His kisses are wet and sloppy and his lips taste vaguely of the beer and buffalo wings he consumed during dinner. She arches into him, trying desperately to feel something, anything, but despite her best efforts, she still feels empty.

Strong fingers make quick work of the buttons running down the front of her floral patterned swing dress. A large hand slips inside the fabric and slides over her ribcage to cup her breast. Alison closes her eyes and exhales as a calloused thumb brushes over her lace-covered nipple and she does her best not to recoil.

"Lorenzo," she breathes out between kisses, shifting uncomfortably under his touch. She had been so sure of what she wanted when she texted Lorenzo early this afternoon, but her plan isn't working like she had hoped-in fact this all is only making her feel worse.

Lorenzo groans in response, spurred on by the breathy sound of his name on Alison's lips. He kisses her hungrily on the mouth before sitting up and yanking his shirt up over his head from the back and tossing it aside. Quickly settling back on top of Alison, he kisses her on the mouth again and then buries his head into her shoulder, his open mouth against her neck causing Alison to squirm uncomfortably under the weight of his body. Lorenzo runs a hand up her thigh, slowly pushing up the hem of her dress as his hand drifts higher.

Alison's stomach rolls with unease as his hand nears her center and suddenly she's pushing at his shoulder and sitting up, forcing Lorenzo to sit up as well. "Lorenzo, hold on. We need to stop," she says, breathless and disheveled.

Lorenzo withdraws his hand and stares at Alison with a concerned look on his face. "What's wrong?"

"I can't do this." Alison tugs at the front of her dress and bows her head, her messy blonde hair falling forward to frame her face.

"Was it something I did?" Lorenzo asks.

"No! You're fine. It's me," Alison tries to assure him.

Lorenzo moves a little awkwardly on the bed and Alison cringes as she notices his hand over his crotch as he attempts to discretely adjust his erection.

"Sorry," she mutters, looking away guiltily when he catches her eye.

Lorenzo opens his mouth to speak but Alison turns back abruptly and cuts him off. "I'm sorry, Lorenzo. I wasn't entirely honest before," she admits in a rush. "I didn't change my mind. I'm still not into you like that."

"Then why'd you ask me out?" Lorenzo peers at her thoughtfully, a soft expression on his face.

He's not angry, just curious, and Alison wishes she could sink into the mattress and disappear so she won't have to face disappointing yet another person in her life.

"Because I'm a horrible person," Alison sighs with regret. She didn't mean for things to get this far. Well, technically she did, but she had every intention of following through when she had started.

That had been the whole point of asking Lorenzo out to begin with—to hook up and move on. To get over Emily because she's tired of feeling that same sharp ache in her chest every time she thinks of the brunette. But she couldn't even do that right. She failed yet again and Lorenzo is just the collateral damage of yet another one of her ill-conceived plans. It's like she hasn't changed at all—she's still a tease and a liar—and she still resorts to using and manipulating people for her own personal gain.

"Ali," Lorenzo starts, his voice stern as he implores her to meet his eyes.

Alison looks up guiltily and sees he's still shirtless—having shed his fitted button down the second she had allowed him to round second base—and she chastises herself for not being attracted to his chiseled jaw and toned body. It would be so much easier if she could just fall for him and forget about her.