You're Not My Spiderman | TASM!Peter Parker x Reader

Part Five

You awoke to strong bands around your waist. You struggled against them as panic filled every pore of your body, until you realised that even though they were strong, they were much softer than the metal bands Hydra used to restrain you with. As your heartbeat slowed down, you realised that the bands were arms.

You felt Peter's breath fan across the back of your neck as he exhaled in his sleep. You felt your cheeks heat up as you realised when you were unintentionally spooning with the cutest guy you'd ever met, but the embarrassment fizzled away quickly when you remembered the events that led up to it.

You could almost still feel the water around you, and it was enough to make your breathing start to get faster. Just as you thought that breathing would soon be impossible, Peter awoke, letting go of you and sitting up in bed, looking around frantically. You watched his actions in slight confusion, and after he determined there was no threat, he looked back at you.

"Are you alright?" he asked softly, brushing some hair out of your face.

You ignored the feeling in your tummy at the action and nodded instead.

"Yeah, I'm okay," you said, your previous panic dispersing in his presence. "Are you?"

"Yeah, sorry about that," Peter said sheepishly. "I just – my spider-senses were going off and I thought that something was wrong."

"Peter-tingle," you corrected, and he rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, sure, whatever," he said.

His eyes softened as he scanned your face, and you looked away awkwardly. You were still in your suit, and you felt embarrassed that you hadn't changed out of it.

"Hey," Peter said gently, causing you to look back at him. "I - I don't know what you were going through last night, but if you ever need to talk about it or anything, I'm here for you."

You smiled softly at him, and tears welled up in your eyes. You blinked them away quickly and shook your head slightly.

"Thank you," you said quietly.

Something was compelling you to tell him. You didn't normally tell many people about your past, seeing as it hurt too much, and you had severe PTSD about it. But you wanted to tell Peter – perhaps it was because it was Peter Parker, and you went to the Peter Parker from your world for almost everything. You felt some strange connection to this Peter – different to the one you had with your Peter, but just as strong, if not more so.

"I – I... when I was..."

You trailed off, trying to find the words to say. It felt like your body was physically stopping you from speaking. It felt like your vocal cords were cut from your brain, and you opened and closed your mouth a few times, no sound coming out.

"You don't have to tell me," Peter said. "But I am here if you ever need to."

"I want to tell you," you whispered. "I – it just might take me a while to – to get the words out."

"That's okay," Peter murmured, nodding in understanding. "Whenever you're ready."

You took a few deep breaths to steady yourself before pushing the words out.

"In my world, there's this organisation called Hydra," you said, the words tumbling out. "They – they're an evil organisation whose ultimate goal is global domination, through terrorist attacks, assassinations... I'm sure you get the gist."

Peter nodded and you took another deep breath before continuing.

"I – they kidnapped me when I was ten, and killed my parents. I – they locked me in a glass box that – that..."

It was getting difficult to breathe as you remembered what they'd done, as you relived the memories. Watching the water rise, banging on the glass, trying to use your powers to break free. The drowning, the breath-holding, and then the resuscitations.

"Hey, hey, it's okay," Peter said, grabbing your hands in his. "You don't have to go into detail. You don't have to continue. You have no obligation to explain any of it to me if you can't, or don't want to."

You sniffled and squeezed his hands lightly, You gave a watery hiccup, before continuing.

"Long story short, they – they drowned me. The glass box filled with water, and I – I can't be in bodies of water anymore," you whispered.

"I – I'm so sorry you had to go through that," Peter said. "I – that's horrible, Y/n."

He pulled you into a hug, and your arms wrapped around him automatically. You felt lighter getting it off your chest, but you also felt exhausted. You remembered your therapist telling you that talking about it could make you tired, but ultimately you'd feel a bit better. And you did honestly feel better.

I can't wait to tell Bucky about this, you thought.

You'd always told Bucky about what you were going through, because he was one of the few people who could relate to it. You always told him when you did something that would point you towards a better mental health, and being able to tell the new Peter about your problems was a definite step forward.

Well, you would tell Bucky if you ever saw him again. The possibility seemed so far out of reach. You had no idea how to even get back, or how to see him again. You hoped that Stephen would be able to get you back soon.

But when you'd go back home... you'd leave this Peter behind. And you really didn't want to. Yes, you had your Peter, and he was amazing, but this Peter... you two had a connection. Or, at least you felt it. You weren't quite sure about him yet, but with the way he was holding you, you were sure that he felt something similar.

Peter let go of you the second his bedroom door opened, and you both sprung off the bed and got into defensive positions. Peter relaxed when a blonde girl entered, but you were still wary.

"Don't worry, Y/n," Peter said breathlessly. "This is my best friend, Gwen."

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