Attraction, desire, and sinfully beautiful, Mika Santana is a devil with the face of an angel. Despite her tragic past, she's never given up her ruthless pursuits for success and vengeance which leaves little to no room for matters of the heart. But...
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My mattress sinks as I dive back into it with my freshly made bag of popcorn. Puffs tumble from the pouch onto the hot pink bed duvets. With one hand, I stuff my mouth full of popcorn and scramble through the HBO catalog using the controller. The buttery crisps grind on my teeth as I swallow and repeat. Silk lace cami nightdress is adorned with wrinkles, looking worn out.
Fifteen dollars a month for this shitty catalog. Seriously. My eyes roll as I restart Degrassi from season one again. Frustration. Boredom. Guilt. It's disgusting how deep the shame has taken root. No amount of distraction is able to erase the sensation in my chest. Why do I feel like this?
My finger reaches in to pick up the kernel that fell from my lips to my boobs. I toss the kernel onto the floor already, dreading having to vacuum later. My hand rests on my necklace, feeling the edge of a circular object-- his purity ring. The silver band glimmers under the crystal-pendant chandelier's yellowish hues, the indents of italics under my fingertips.
After reading the contents in my diary and digesting the whirlpool wild rollercoaster of information, I asked Diablo to give me a break. I didn't feel like being fucked like a rag doll. I didn't feel like socializing with anyone. But out of everything, I didn't have the energy to face him again. I don't even understand why I feel like this!
That's enough self-loathing.
Back to Degrassi, a place with adequate drama to overshadow the sorrowful, shallow puddle I built for myself. Manny Santos, a queen, a legend, my spirit animal even at the prime age of twelve, she was destined for greatness. Much like me. Popcorn thrust out from the bag as the vibration from my phone scares the shit out of me.
With a scolding face, I peek at my phone fully, expecting to see him calling again. He's been nonstop, relentless this entire weekend. If it wasn't phone calls, it was messages. I stop reading them after the first day. They only functioned to make me feel shittier about myself. To my surprise, it wasn't Asiel.
It was Tania.
"Hello?"
"Hey babes, are you coming to the club?" The worried voice of Tania asks through my phone.
I perk my lips. "Probably not. Why?"
Tania sighs heavily, her breath making the speaker crackle. "Well, your little Muneco is here, and he's stinking drunk. He's asking for you, Mika. Practically begging for you."
I thrust another handful of popcorn into my mouth and mumble, "Which one?"
"Asiel!" Tania exclaims, her voice bursting my eardrums. "He claims you've been ignoring him. This fucker has been clinging onto me like I'm a tree. If he was interested in fucking, and giving me extra cash to spoil myself, I'll be totally down. But all he wants to do is sulk about you. Yawn. Boring. Come get him, Mika. Save us both."
"He's that drunk?" I say, my voice lower than before.
"Very. Mika, please!" Tania begs, her voice dragging out the syllables. "I don't want to deal with a drunkard! Dragon is roaming around, and I'm craving his cock. I will not miss my chance because of your selfishness. Save the poor boy."
