Kisah Masyitah Rukyah

Chapter 16 - Tanpa Kuasa/Powerless

A nearby lightning strike jolts me awake in my sheets.

"Damn it," I curse. The weather's been dark and gloomy recently. Not very usual of Malaysia to have this sort of thing. Without turning my body, I reach for my phone somewhere on the floor and check the time. The screen almost blinds me as it shows that it's 7 in the morning. 

"Ugh..."

I toss and turn myself on the bed, trying to find the perfect position again. After doing just that for the next 10 minutes, I don't even want to damn sleep. I'm still tired as all hell.

I sit up and hug a pillow. My cross lies on the side table right next to me, its silver surface still stained by a bit of blood. 

Harmony's.

I've always had questions intended for my creator. Over the past few days, I've asked Him in my prayers: what have we done to deserve this? All of us are fighting for equality amongst our kind, our people. Is that not a noble cause?

In just a couple of days since we ran from home, one of my best friends has been left behind and possessed. The other is in critical condition a few rooms away. 

Is this retaliation for my previous sins? If so, then why has the Lord roped in the two of them? Surely that is not the righteous way. Why has the Lord not punished me personally? Have they sinned more than I have? That's hard to believe. I'm no saint.

I shake those thoughts away. Early in the morning is not the time to be pondering these things. I put on my red hoodie that I've tossed over into the corner and make sure it fits snug on me to fight the cold. I put on my cross bracelet after wiping it and leave the room.

I wipe the dirty muck in my eyes. I don't know what it's called in English, but in Malay it's tahi mata. Eye shit. Very fitting to my current condition. I haven't looked into a mirror yet, but I bet I'm having a bad hair day too. Harmony would've loved joking about it. 

She could see the good in everyone and everything. When I look at her, it's like looking at the Sun. Glaring at her in mild annoyance, but acknowledging that she helps me live.

Every minute I spend awake is a minute I could've used resting and taking in these optimal sleeping conditions. Too bad the world isn't perfect. Far from it.

I take my time going down the stairs. Just thinking about my family back in Negeri Sembilan with each step. Ibu would be awake right now, helping Cassandra get ready for school. She'd probably be at the school gates already, bidding farewell to our mother and getting ready for a grueling day of tolerating Malaysia's education system.

You have no idea what I'd do for a chance to contact them. Makira always shoots it down whenever I mention it. Wiretaps, tracking cookies, decryption and God knows that else she said. I know she's a badass and all and I should probably listen to her, but still.

I pull my phone out and open my WhatsApp.

"Don't, Casey," warns a voice from somewhere in the lower floor. It's raspy and gruff, but still feminine.

"Come on, it's just one message."

"Yes, and that could be all it takes for JAKIS to be on us. That's the last thing we need."

I sigh and put my phone away. "Do you have any family you're still in contact with? You know how much I miss mine? All sorts of shit must be going through their heads when my sister saw my face in the news."

I finally spot our leader Makira sitting on a chair right in front of Xiao's blood marker. Her light brown shoulder-length hair is all in her face while she's reading a book as thick as an Oxford dictionary, pen in hand. Her real leg is crossed over her curved prosthetic one. She looks at me with her one good eye through messy bangs.