The Thing About Samuel

Chapter Thirty-Two - Jason

Jason - May 2003

'I missed you,' Annabelle said breathily as she clasped her arms tight around Jason's midriff. Her sweet-scented hair wafting into Jason's nostrils and sending a warm feeling swelling through his body. She peeled back just enough to look up to him and press her lips into his. He pushed back, with eyes gently closed.
​'I missed you too,' he said as they released.
​Behind them, Ryan climbed out of the minibus, his hold-all slung over his back effortlessly.
​'Do I get one of those?'
​'Shut up,' Annabelle retorted, but Ryan's cheeky wink suggested to Jason that the questions might have been intended for him, rather than his girlfriend.
​As Ryan walked away, Jason placed his hands around Annabelle's waist and pulled her in for one more kiss, willing it to send flickers of heat and excitement through his tired and aching body...
​'Want to come over to mine tonight for dinner and...' Annabelle bit her lip, which she always did if she was excited about telling Jason something. Her eyes flashed with anticipation. Maybe she had a new development for her novel? Or a new lead on some enticing article.
​'And?' Jason urged, gently shaking his hands around her waist.
​'And,' She grinned. 'My mum may have said that you're welcome to stay over. If you want to, of course.'
​Jason's heart was suddenly alight with that excitement. 'Yes,' he cheered. 'Yes definitely. I just need to go home and wash first and see my parents. You sure it's okay with them?'
​'Well, my mum said yes, I just need to tell my dad.'
​'Tell him, huh?'
​'My mum will win him over,' she beamed.
​'Okay, okay. Well let me know what he says. What time?'
​'Come over around five? We can have dinner and then maybe a nice relaxed evening with a film or something? I'll grab some snacks!'
​Annabelle lifted her hands to Jason's cold cheeks, and then she pulled him in for another kiss.
​'Dad!' She then cheered to somewhere behind Jason. 'See you later, okay?'
​'Definitely,' he grinned.

Only a few hours later, after a hot shower to steam away the weekend of camping, Jason stood in the living room with his mum and dad, receiving the parental briefing before his night stay over at Annabelle's.
'No funny business!' his mum cautioned with a cheeky wink and a pinch of his cheeks.
​Jason batted her hands away from his face playfully, laughing.
​'Mum! I'm eighteen. And I'm not like that!'
​His dad bellowed a laugh from behind. 'What are you, gay?' With a hearty slap to his back, as Jason's heart sunk into his stomach.
​His mum smiled, but his dad revelled in his own joke for a moment.
​'Oh, that would have been nice, I would have had someone to shop with!' his mum joked.
​'Mum! I don't reckon I'd enjoy shopping either way,' Jason replied with a nervous, breathy laugh.
​'That's right,' his dad piped in, clasping a firm grip onto Jason's shoulder. 'Grab your bag, your girlfriend is waiting for you... and the rest of your evening,' he sniggered again.
​'Oh behave! And you,' she pointed to Jason. 'Behave whilst you're there! Don't want you getting a bad name for yourself with a family like that.'
​In reply to a wink from his mum, Jason promised her he would be on his best behaviour. Besides, at the moment, there was more a nervous uncertainty bubbling away in his stomach than excitement. Why was that?
​Of course, he knew the answer to that. Ryan. Would he be at Annabelle's tonight? He didn't have any reason to, surely? But maybe if he knew Jason was planning on being there then he might find a reason to also visit his cousin.

The door swung open, and a gleeful Annabelle stood in its frame.
​'You're here!'
​As she moved forward and flung her arms around Jason, a waft of some rich, hearty food carried itself over him. Behind her in the kitchen, Mr. and Mrs. Roberts leant against the counter. He waved with one hand as he embraced the slight frame of his girlfriend with his other. Her perfumery scent cutting through the richness of the food with a freshness that sent tingles down his spine.
​'Hi Mr. Knight!' Annabelle called with a little wave as they pulled apart.
​'Hi love!' Jason's dad's voice called from the window of his van on the driveway. 'See you later, Son!'
​'Bye Dad!' Jason replied as he turned with a smile to his dad.
​He lingered for a moment as his dad's van slowly retreated down the extravagant driveway. Part of him wished he was going back with his dad. The safety of his own bedroom, where it didn't matter whether or not he preferred girls to boys, or both equally, or one altogether more than the other...
​But, as the headlights disappeared out of the elegant gates of the driveway, he knew he was alone again. Well, not alone, he had his girlfriend, but he was also harbouring something else now.
​'You okay, Jase?' Annabelle's brow furrowed with concern and he pushed a smile to his face and shook away the thoughts rattling around inside his head.
​'Yeah, fine. Fine. Just tired is all.' He forced a yawn. 'Ready to chill with you. Dinner smells good.'
​Jason offered, taking an exaggerated big breath in of the savoury scents from the kitchen. 'Is anyone else joining us tonight?' He asked, trying to keep the curiosity and nervousness from his voice. Of course, by anyone, he actually meant Ryan.
​'Like who?' Annabelle smiled, perhaps picking up on his nerves as they slowly moved towards the kitchen.
​He shrugged and tried to play it off as a casual remark. 'Ryan, or any more family, you know?'
​Annabelle let out a small, but confused, laugh. 'Nope. Just me, you, Mum and Dad.' She leaned in close. 'I reckon there'll be a few serious chats over dinner if you're staying the night,' she whispered.
​Jason squeezed her in his arm. 'Don't worry. I've been told to behave several times by my own parents!'
​
Throughout the evening, there had indeed been a few jokes exchanged over mouthfuls of braised steak and vegetables as cooked by Mrs. Roberts. It tasted amazing, and Jason enjoyed as much of it as he could, trying to slow down the time to when him and Annabelle might be left alone. A few months ago, he would have given anything to be spending time alone in Annabelle's bedroom with her, but now, all it did was incite anxiety. What might happen? Could anything happen?
​But soon, Jason didn't need to ask the question of how it would feel, as he rested against Annabelle's headboard, and she clicked the door shut behind her.
​'Finally, alone!' She sighed with relief, and a huge smile.
​Jason grinned. 'Feels like ages since I saw you.'
​'I know, the weekend seemed to drag by. But,' she hopped cheerfully over to her desk and grabbed her violet coloured notebook before joining Jason on the bed. 'I made progress with this!'
​Jason appeared behind her, resting his chin on the top of her head, willing the sweet scent of her hair to rouse something inside him. Anything.
​Annabelle excitedly flipped the notebook open to a page of excitable scribblings and then turned to her laptop and tapped away at the keys, seemingly navigating through several folders until she settled on one document and clicked open a file named 'Untitled' by Annabelle Roberts.
​'What's this?' Jason nervously laughed as he saw a photo of the Lake District, very similar to Wasdale Head, pop up under the title and for a brief moment, he lost control of his thoughts and started to wonder if somehow Annabelle had been on the visit. And if she had, had she heard anything? Such as him debating whether Annabelle was the one?
​'Don't worry, it's not about you,' she giggled, evidently picking up on his nervousness. Jason gulped in relief.
​'Well, there might happen to be one character based on you.' She glanced back shyly over her shoulder. 'Or rather two characters, based on us.'
​'Is that so?' Jason smirked.
'Maybe we could go back to the Lake District but together this time?' Her slight fingers pulled at his hoodie at his midriff.
​Jason smiled, and Annabelle bit her lip.
​Her face softened. 'I've missed you.'
​Jason felt his heart lift, and his worries subside a little. 'Me too,' he smiled, genuinely.
​'So, do you want to know what I wanted to say to you on the phone?'
​For a moment, Jason searched his memory. Rewinding back through many, many, images of Ryan's face – sleeping, hiking, angry, upset, winking... - and resting back in a service station where Annabelle nervously giggled at the other end of the phone to him, and he felt a million miles away from the girl he thought he loved. He did love. He does love. He rolled his eyes in annoyance with himself.
​'You okay?'
​He shook his frown from his face and curled a smile into his cheeks.
​'Yes, yes. So, what did you want to say?'
​'I bet you've been worried about it all weekend haven't you? I hope you managed to have fun, I didn't mean to worry you.' Annabelle stood up, kissed his cheek, and loosely took his hand in hers as she moved over to the bed.​
​Jason found himself sat at her feet on her bed, as she shuffled closer to him, gently running her hands around his wrists. It tickled.
​'So...' She faltered, and laughed again before taking a big, deep breath in and out.
​'What is it?' he sniggered. 'You're making me nervous now!'
​Annabelle lifted her round, glistening eyes and her lips twitched into a gentle and sincere smile. 'Well... Jason, I... I think...No, I know...'
​'Yes?' Jason grinned.
​'I love you.'
​And then, there it was. The spark that Jason had been waiting for. Suddenly, as if chains were falling from his shoulders, feet, hands, lungs, heart... he broke free, and moved forward to press his lips against Annabelle's. All thoughts moved to the beautiful girl in front of him. Her smile. Her eyes. Her giggle.
​'I love you, too.' He paused a second to really appreciate everything he held in his arms once again. 'So much.'
​Annabelle let out an excited laugh and then Jason felt her hands lace through the hair on the back of his head and pull his body onto hers. And they kissed, deeply. Again, and again.

As the football sailed somewhere off the pitch and into the bushes at the back of the field, one of the opposing team called for them to 'Take five everyone!'
​Jason threw his head back, grabbing fresh air from above him as the heat from an intense first half of the football match rose from underneath his shirt. He wiped the sweat from his brow with his forearm.
​'Nice game so far, Jase,' Doubtfire, one of Jason's teammates, commended with a pat to his back.
​'Thanks.'
​And then, as Jason's eyes tracked Doubtfire running to the side of the pitch, he met another face that suddenly sent his heart racing. Ryan.
​'Hey, Jase!'
​'Ryan. What are you doing here?'
​'Whoa, what's with the attitude? I just came to see you play!' he jested, as always.
​'Does Annabelle know you're here?'
​'Of course not. She's at home. We're all round for dinner tonight and she said you were coming over after football. So, here I am.'
​Jason sighed. He looked around and two of his teammates were already looking over. 'I've got five minutes. Want to go for a walk?'
​Ryan's eyes took notice of the boys watching them. He grinned. 'Sure,' he agreed with a slight shake of his head.
​They walked down the side of the field and turned round the back of the clubhouse where the team often hung out afterwards. The kind of place that only sold the cheap, super sweet kind of coca cola and crinkle cut crisps. But here, they were alone.
​'Why are you here, Ryan?' Jason asked.
​Since his evening with Annabelle, Jason had been focussed on their relationship once again. Only a few times had Ryan entered his head. A few more than he would admit to Ryan in person, though.
​'I like football now.'
​Jason threw a frowning look of disbelief at Ryan. But Jason couldn't fight that something was lighter inside him for seeing Ryan. Had he missed him? Was that possible?
​'Fine, fine. I wanted to see you. I tried to not think about you, but I can't. I have to tell you something.'
​The words rang around Jason's head. I wanted to see you. This was becoming something more for Ryan. Something more than flirting. His mind flickered to Annabelle. Being in her bedroom. The kisses. The closeness. And then then the words just came out.
​'We slept together.'
​Ryan's eyes shot to Jason in confusion.
​'Me and Annabelle. Annabelle and me. We... we slept together.'
​Ryan closed his mouth and nodded slowly for a moment. 'Right,' he finally said.
​The air between them fell cold, and a cloud of silence descended.
​'I'll see you later.' Ryan went to leave but Jason found himself reaching out, and grabbing Ryan's hand, and pulling him back.
​They were now face to face, Jason's heart was pounding. Ryan looked upset, and Jason had done that to him. And he couldn't deny that even with the thoughts of Annabelle filling his head, he also knew that there was something about Ryan that he didn't want to let go.
​Thump...Thump...Thump...
​Jason could feel his heart resonating up into his throat. He knew there was one way to understand for himself if this thing, if it could even be classed as 'a thing', between him and Ryan was real.
​Ryan had moved in closer. He felt the slow warm breaths from Ryan's nose against his cheeks. He felt Ryan's body allow itself to move into his. And then, as Ryan neared, Jason moved forward and pressed his lips against Ryan's.
​After a few seconds, they slowly peeled back from each other, but their hips stayed connected.
​'What was that?' Ryan asked.
​'I have no idea,' Jason confessed. 'But since the camping trip, I've found myself thinking about you. And us.'
​Ryan's eyes spread wide and seemed to arch into a smile.
​'Lame,' he sniggered. 'Me too.'
​They laughed for a second.
​'I don't want to hurt Annabelle,' Jason admitted.
​Ryan's shoulders dropped. 'Then why would you sleep together?'
​That hurt him. Jason could see that now. And Ryan was right, why did he do that?
​'So, what happens now?' Ryan added.
​Jason shrugged. 'I... I don't know.'
​'Me neither,' Ryan added, before slowly letting his forehead rest back against Jason's. 'I like you, Jason.'
​He laughed, and sniffled.
​'I think I do too,' Jason whispered.