I'm Just Tryna be Wasted (PART 1)

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(Y/O) = *age* years old

**⚠️TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️  MENTIONS OF SUICIDE, ALCOHOL, AND DRUGS ⚠️**

Kurapika was alone for most of his life, especially after what had happened to his clan. When he met you, it all changed.

Before he met you, though, he drank, drank, drank, and drank. He drank until he was worse than just wasted. He didn't know how or what to feel after his clan was annihilated. He thought that getting wasted would make him want to feel. All he ever did was sleep. He would even purposely skip events because he wanted to get wasted.

"Nah.. fuck that shit. I'm just tryna be wasted.." he would say to himself after getting invited to the 20th event that month.

His vision was blurrier than ever after he developed and alcohol addiction, but he still saw you. Only you.

He would only ever sleep. He would only wake up to pop open multiple bottles of whiskey, champagne, wine, and any expensive alcoholic beverages that he could get his hands on. He chugged them all day, 24/7. He would pour them into his glass to the point that they would run over and overflow. He felt his head rolling over and over again after drinking. He would even spike his tea, coffee, or other non-alcoholic beverages so he couldn't feel.

He wanted to know what it was like in the real world. He wanted to sip something that wasn't alcoholic or spiked. He wanted to fly on a plane.. or do just about anything else to experience something other than his crippling depression.

To experience something was his dream. Obviously, his drinking and drug problems didn't help him. He was able to train himself to act normal in public. He was able to act so normal that if you were to walk up to him, you would've thought that he was a healthy and stable young man.

He was on the verge of suicide. His eyes only showed pain when he was alone.

Drinking and drugs was the only thing he would do. It was his so-called "hobby". He only went to work to be able to afford all these "hobbies", and keep up with his apartment and bills.

Everything was hell for him. Worse than hell. He was so close to ending it. He was so close until he met you.

-How you two met-

"Excuse me, do you- Hey.. HEY! ARE YOU OKAY!?" you asked as you were about to ask him for directions until you immediately noticed that he seemed to be in so much pain.
"Hm? Oh. Yes, I'm feeling just fine.." he said, obviously lying.
"Are you sure...? I can tell that you're not okay. Do you want help? I can-" he interrupted you grabbing your hand as you were about to run and get help.
"I am just fine.."
"You're not. I have good intuition, you know..." you said as Kurapika started to chuckle. He then smiled.
"Ahhh... alright. You got me."
"I know I did. Come to my apartment asap." you said as you pulled Kurapika by his arm.

You two arrived at your apartment. You gave him a glass of ice water and fruit snacks. You sat him down on your bedroom floor. You floor had two beanbag chairs that were perfect for the two of you. You had a king sized bed... because why not... Your room was very cozy for anyone who walked in.

"So, sit and tell me. What's up with you? I'm in training to be a psychiatrist, so this is also good for me."
"Alright. Thanks, but you don't even know me.. and.. didn't you just technically kidnap me?" he laughed.
"I- uh.. I guess that's both true.. but I still want to help you. You seem like a cool guy, you know?"
"I guess so. My name's Kurapika. Kurapika Kurta. I'm 19, and I guess we live in the same building. My apartment is only a few doors down from here."
"Oh? I'm (Y/N) (L/N). I'm (Y/O).."
"Hmm? That's a pretty name."
"D-don't try flirting with me. We just met." you say in a weird tone.
"That's cute."
"ANYWAYS.. what's wrong? I immediately noticed something when I first talked to you. Actually, don't tell me. I want you to tell me when you're comfortable enough, so let's get to know each other first?"
"That sounds perfect, (Y/N)." he smiled as you blushed.

You two talked for what seemed like years.mYou two bonded very well and always hung out with each other when you two had the chance. Over time, though, Kurapika developed feelings for you. Hard feelings. He felt as if you didn't feel the same. He ended up drinking and spiking his drinks more and more because he wanted to make himself numb because he didn't want to think about how you didn't like him back. Little did he know, you had feelings too, but didn't know about his drinking and drug problems.

By now, you two have been friends for a few months.

Kurapika then invited you over to talk about something important.

"What's up, Pika?"
"Hey. I need to tell you something really important right now."
"What is it? I won't judge you. If anything, I'll help you out."
"Okay... Listen. I like you, (Y/N). I love you. I've been in love with you for a little bit now.."
"Kurapika..."
"You're probably taken already. I mean.. if you are, I wouldn't be surprised.."
"Why's that..?"
"You're gorgeous. Absolutely breathtaking. I could list a million things about you that I love and I still would have more."
"Hey.."
"Hmm..?"
"Kurapika, I love you too. I'm not taken either I promise." you say as you both laugh.
"There was something else though. I'm sure you'll regret what you said after you here me say it."
"Kurapika, I'll never judge you. You know that."
"(Y/N)."
"Yes, Kurapika?"
"I have an alcohol and drug problem."
"Kurapika..."
"It's been a thing pretty much after my family died. I started pretty young too... I also have been... wanting to off-myself..."

You obviously knew about his family, so you weren't surprised that he was drinking for that reason, but you were definitely surprised that he was drinking anyways. You were also surprised that he had thoughts about suicide.

"I've also been drinking because of you..."
"Because of me!? Did I do anything!? I swear I never meant to-" you say as you start to tear up.
"Nonono. It's not like that. It's dumb, but I drank more because I thought that you'd never like me back... Initially, I wasn't going to tell you that I felt this way about you because I felt that you would leave me because of this.."
"You're wrong... You're so wrong. If I love you, I love you no matter what. Even if you have this going on, I still love you. You should've told me earlier, Pika.."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be. I'm gonna help you. K?"
"Sure.."
"I love you. I'm gonna help you. Also... I wouldn't leave you for something like this. Trust me."
"I love you too, (Y/N)."
"Okay.. hm.. starting today.. We're gonna deal with those drugs that you've been taking. Then, we can take care of all that alcohol?"

"Let's do it."

You worked and helped for months so that you could get Kurapika to quit his addictions. You two made quite a bit of progress in just a few months.

As you two were working together, your feelings for each other developed even more. As Kurapika stopped doing drugs and controlled his drinking, he began to feel like his old self again. He felt like himself from before the massacre.

A/N: Sooo um.... idrk how i feel abt this chapter.. i had like this idea and wrote this all up in like 1-2 hours tops, but after reading it, idrk if it's actually good?? please lmk lol. im gonna try and make part 2 (last part) good? but yeah.... (spoiler alert: part 2 of this is also very shitty)

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