Broken Pencils

Never Again

April 19

If this world were to end in the next second, I would never know. I would simply be alive, and then I wouldn't. Just a simple death that I never saw coming.

Would people rather die suddenly with no warning or would they rather know?

Personally, I'd rather be able to live infinitely, but not in the way most people would expect. I don't want to live forever; I know of the hellish life that awaits me if that were to occur.

Instead, I want to live life in every way I can. I want to see the universe from every angle. I am absolutely fascinated by the stars.

Would it be so wrong to give up on all of my dreams to make only one of them come true?

~~~

"Oh, the weather outside is frightful, and the fire is also frightful. Since I've no place to cry, let me die, let me die, let me die," Marcy sang to themself over and over. Was it anywhere remotely close to Christmas time? Nope. But Marcy still felt the ode was a perfect fit for today. Or any day, really.

It was nearing summertime, meaning that the outside world was becoming less and less friendly. People hung out on their decks, talking with their neighbors, and discussing the newest baseball games. Oh, the horror.

"How can people stand living like this? Talking to people? Gross," Marcy mumbled to themself.

Afterschool was one of the worst times of day. On most occasions, Marcy would get home at around 3:00 pm. Usually, they could do their homework, play a video game or two, then eat dinner, then do whatever they wanted. 

Now that they had exactly two days of school left, and no homework, sitting around at 3:00 was not particularly exciting. They could start playing a game, but they were kinda tired of all of their current games. They could watch T.V, but they already binged the entirety of Saiki K, so what else was there to watch? 

Now that school was practically over, they had to suffer like this for the next three months.

Usually summer vacation was all that Marcy looked forward to, but now, it seemed more like a jail sentence.

They didn't really have the motivation to do anything, really. There wasn't much to do anyway.

Suddenly, Marcy heard their name called. It was... time for dinner?

That didn't seem right, it was only 2:53 just a second ago, but... it was already 5:00.

What the fuck is happening?! Marcy internally screamed as they made their way to the dining room.

The next day of school ended.

And so did the next.

And suddenly, summer break had started and had no intention of stopping anytime soon.

Marcy groaned to themself, unsure why they were this upset in the first place. It was summer, that was a good thing.

Well, actually, it wasn't technically summer until June 21, but whatever.

They grabbed the nearest pillow and shoved their face in it, groaning once again.

Summer vacation may be miserable, but at least they had friends this time. Technically one friend and one girlfriend, which was actually better. Though, it'd be even better if it was two girlfriends.

"Anne..." Marcy found themself accidentally saying out loud. But it was totally fine, though, because like everyone just randomly says the name of their friend in a longing way while being miserable and it's totally not a sign of how desperately they needed help/attention, right?