My 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 (YEONGYU/BEOMJUN)

1

yeonjun is losing his mind.

he watches from the corner of his eye how beomgyu is literally just sitting on soobin's lap not even a few seats away. he chooses to ignore it. he's been trying to ignore it for a long time. a really fucking long time. he cannot look away anymore.

they're getting ready for a performance, and yeonjun is getting his makeup done. in absolute silence, may he add, before beomgyu came in and began cuddling with a completely dressed soobin. what's really funny to yeonjun is that soobin doesn't even push him away. he's ready to get up on stage, and beomgyu is rubbing up against him like that. why is soobin not getting rid of beomgyu?

"you're so cute, beomgyu-yah." soobin coos, and pinches beomgyu's cheeks. beomgyu giggles a bit at that. he sinks further into soobin's hand. and he fucking lets him. yeonjun struggles to not scream at the top of his lungs to keep both of them away. he tones his anger down to just curling his fist into a punch, and rests his hands on his lap. the stylist notices and understands yeonjun's anger. when he finds her staring at him, he relaxes his fingers and tries to let go of his anger. breathe in and breathe out, he reminds himself. don't behave too obvious.

but he did! all the time! yeonjun is probably the most obvious person there ever has been when it comes to terms of love. everyone with eyes can see how he basically has his eyes glued to beomgyu twenty-four seven. even the stylist noona has caught on. apart from beomgyu, everyone has, apparently.

jealousy pulses through yeonjun's veins. beomgyu, who has been clearly keeping away from him for more than a week now, seems to be at his friendship peak with literally everyone else in and outside of their group. beomgyu has always been the one to cancel his plans with his other idol friends just to hang out with yeonjun, or the rest of the band. but all of a sudden, it's like tomorrow by together is a four-membered group and yeonjun doesn't even exist to beomgyu.

beomgyu has even met up with all of his other idol friends, like twice this week. respectfully, by no means is yeonjun trying to gatekeep or limit him to the group but he cannot help but wonder what changed between them? beomgyu, who used to come to yeonjun for late night cuddles when he couldn't sleep, beomgyu who used to be yeonjun's little puppy-did he forget him and replace him so soon? with someone like soobin, who already has his hueningkai and taehyun benefits? yeonjun feels a betrayed pang in his chest.

"oh, look." soobin says a little loudly, a hundred per cent guessing yeonjun's jealousy right. through the mirror, soobin shoots yeonjun a wink. yeonjun rolls his eye at him hard. soobin nudges beomgyu lightly and shifts his attention on yeonjun who was still seated and getting his hair done now. "yeonjun hyung's biceps look so cool, beomgyu-ah. have you been working out more lately, hyung?"

yeonjun watches as beomgyu pops his eye open slowly, and takes a good look at yeonjun. beomgyu just stares blankly and it makes yeonjun gulp hard. does he not like it? is beomgyu really upset with yeonjun over something? what can yeonjun do to fix it? beomgyu still has his eyes fixed on yeonjun's well-defined hands, and he's just not looking away. neither looking away nor speaking on it. yeonjun feels self-conscious under beomgyu's intense gaze. that's what his feelings do to him when beomgyu's around. pure torture.

yeonjun's 'gay awakening' was choi beomgyu. well, yeonjun didn't really go through a dramatic realization which involved tons of denial. it just...happened, with time. beomgyu always stuck around yeonjun, and that was a fact. everybody could tell that. and it's normal yeonjun thinks. it's normal to have your favourites in a group. everyone has them. he doesn't know who beomgyu's favourite is (he has a sneaking suspicion that it's hueningkai, but yeonjun doesn't mean to assume anything), but for sure if anyone ever asks him who his favourite member was, yeonjun wouldn't even have to think once, let alone twice.

in a breath, without a thought-he'd choose beomgyu. soobin had pointed this out earlier, hence yeonjun thinks he really isn't subtle about it.

beomgyu has looked away from the highlight that soobin wanted to show him, and yeonjun caught him murmuring something into soobin's shoulder. he's too far to hear it, damn it. yeonjun wants to know what beomgyu thinks of his outfit. does beomgyu approve of it? does yeonjun look hot enough?

beomgyu stands up straight. yeonjun's face beams up. maybe beomgyu is going to actually have a nice and civil conversation with him now. if he's lucky, beomgyu might even compliment him. yeonjun shakes his head a little when he hears his own thoughts. from an outsider's point of view, he must look so desperate and just -pathetically in love. that he is, and he's proud of it. he wouldn't trade beomgyu for the world. excitement bubbles up in yeonjun when beomgyu steals another glance at him.

"uh, i should check on the maknaes." this statement is directed towards soobin, obviously. now beomgyu doesn't look at yeonjun at all. he's looking right at soobin, and the taller of the two sneaks a look at yeonjun. he sees his bright face turn a little down. but it's yeonjun, soobin knows him. he wouldn't show his sorrow out in the public like that. he watches yeonjun gain momentum again. he watches him sport a little smile to his hairstylist. yeonjun looks down into his phone in slight disappointment.

"check on the maknaes?" soobin asks quickly, trying to make beomgyu stay. "but they're out to get-"

"sorry hyung, need to check on them, like right now." beomgyu replies absurdly, like he didn't even know what sort of a stupid excuse he was making. he shuffles uncomfortably.

"beomgyu!" soobin calls out, but beomgyu's out already. he just-walked out of the styling room.

yeonjun doesn't comment on it. soobin doesn't either.

maybe beomgyu really needs to check on the maknaes.

yeonjun tries not to think too much of it. he fails eventually.