Disenchantment: Bean's Sister

Part 17; The Magician's Fool

a few days went by of tax collections and complaining from dad. he spent so much money building a vault that he was causing citizens to drown in debt to have dreamland regain stability. on top of that his anger is causing a short temper with bean. today i sat on a ledge of the castle, dangling my feet over the edge as i watched stan the executioner roll bean out in a "drunkard's barrel" as a punishment into sobriety.
"she had it coming" luci said as he jumped up next to me lighting a cigarette.
"yeah but, does zøg ever stop to wonder why she drinks? it's clear that the whole state of this family is extremely toxic and bean leaning to alcohol to feel better about it all should be something that has a much more obvious solution.." i sighed.
"which is.?" he replied cluelessly.
"communication! better treatment! less barrel punishments and more understanding words! i- i don't know. i just feel like there's a lack of effort from zøg to do things about this besides yelling or public humiliation."
"all of that is crap. look at her rolling down the street. oh- she's headed this way!" luci laughed.
"how about you go down there and join her!" i said as i pretended to push him, making sure he didn't actually fall over the ledge.
"woah WOAH!! lina. don't do that again." he grabbed my arm.
"relax, you know i wouldn't have let go." i laughed, jokingly petting his head as i got off the ledge and walked to the throne room. i heard him mumbling to himself as i walked off.

as i walked down the hall to the throne room, bean was rolling down the other side and burst the throne room's doors open. i walked in behind her and saw odval, zøg, and lots of coins being dumped on the floor. as bean rolled towards the steps, the barrel fell apart and bean got up and dusted herself off with an "ow."
"oh.. hello bean. learn your lesson.?" zøg said with a sassy tone.
"you know perfectly well you can't teach me a damn thing." bean crossed her arms.
"i couldn't have said it better myself.." odval chimes in.
"oh just shut it odval, i'm sick of you coming in between me and my dad." bean groaned as odval stepped in front of her.
"sire may i- oh here comes the barrel plank-" he said as he ducked when bean threw the plank his way.
"and i am sick of being treated like a second class citizen who you can strong arm into submission!" bean added.
"it's true. i think you two would work so much better together if you just communicated more and demanded things less. like barrels. stop the barrels dad." i said as i walked next to bean.
"i'll put you in a barrel if you say barrel one more time lina." zøg groaned as the taxes from the elves got wagoned in and poured on the floor.
"ugh. you're pathetic. i am so over you." bean said as she held her hand out to zøg and turned away. he pulled the lever over and over and bean jumped past every opening in the ground. i waited for him to stop and awkwardly shuffled out the room and waved as i ran for the door.
"man. zøg sucks. wanna hit the bar?" bean said to me as we walked down the hall.
"he really can't teach you a thing huh?" i laughed, "let's go."

bean and i walked over to the bar, and we could hear commotion going on inside before we even opened the door.
"what do you think is happening in there?" i asked looking over at her.
"i have no clue, and i don't even care enough to wonder." she said as she opened the door.
"i need beer!" bean yelled.
luci was at the back table wrestling a bartender.
"ooh!" i cheered as i pulled up a seat at the table right next to the two.
"shh shut up!" elfo shushed everyone as bean walked up to him. "luci's about to arm wrestle mumbles to win the whole bar."
i was looking over at elfo while he explained as luci's tail tapped my hand.
"hey lina, watch this." luci joked as he flexed his open arm, holding arm wrestling position with the other.
i laughed as elfo sighed, "just go already!"
the whole bar chimed in with yeahs and do its.
"alright! ready... 1.. 2.. 3!" luci said as he poked mumble's eyes and pushed his arm down.
"oh my god." i laughed into a sigh.
the whole bar cheered as mumbles walked out and luci grabbed his towel.
"all hail luci! our new bar owner!" elfo yelled as luci smiled.
"you know.. i've always wanted to slowly poison people. now drink up degenerates!"
everyone in the bar cheered as bean sat down between elfo and i.
"ugh. i hate zøg!" bean groaned, holding her head up with her hands.
the elves behind us booed and cheered things like "down with zøg!" angrily.
"what's with all the cute booing?" bean added.
"you didn't see the pile of elf taxes in the throne room earlier today.?" i asked as elfo added on,
"zøg has just been taxing the elves to the point where they're starving to death but please, tell us more about your princess problems." he said sarcastically.
"he just- thinks he can do whatever he wants you know!" bean slumped down and sighed.
"mm last time i checked that is how kings work." luci added as he cleaned a shot glass.
"he's nothing but a bully and a theif. he's got it all stocked up in his stupid vault. how would he like it if someone stole it all from him?" she continued.
"bean i think stealing from dad is just gonna prove him right with how you act and get you shoved in a barrel again! maybe if we just talked to him he'd-" i started but was interrupted by an elf bringing a seat between me and bean and hopping up on it, forcing me to scoot away. i groaned.
"word on the street is you need to get some money from a stupid vault. the name's grifto! i may know a thing or two about stealing." he said suspiciously as he gave bean her money that he somehow stole.
"no way! my change purse!" she yelled, "you're good.."
"here's your shoes." grifto added, putting bean's boots on the table.
"woah.. and you polished them!" she added, staring at her boots.
"i am an elf. me and my friends we fix all kinds of things! shoes, belts, economic injustice, sandals. i'll introduce you!" he said as he held his hand out. as bean and elfo got up with him, i thought about if i wanted to join or not.
"you aren't going with?" luci said as he cleaned another glass.
"no.. i will. i just- i don't know, something about that guy is weird." i whispered as i watched him walk closer to the door.
"lina. everything is suspicious to you. stop being such a detective and live a little! you and i both know you'll get to the bottom of it if he really is bad, and if he isn't.. well i'll just do a told ya so dance and embarrass you a little." he smirked and leaned over the table to get closer to me.
"alright i get it!" i laughed softly. "i'll see you later luci." i tilted his head down and kissed the top of it, knowing he wanted a kiss on the lips. just because he did it once, doesn't mean it'll happen again so fast.
"damn it." luci groaned.
i chuckled as i got up and went to catch up with the others.