What Are The Chances?

Chapter 8: Ellis

After I stormed out of the closet, with my shirt messed up and hair still messy, I went to the cafeteria with Cyrus. I felt a bunch of eyes turn to look in my direction when I walked in, but I was used to it. So I played it cool and sat down next to one of my friends, Jeremiah and he gave me a look as if we were trying not to laugh. I then looked over at Cyrus and he's staring at me too, with a milk box in one hand, phone in the other. "What?"

"So how about you tell us the truth? Where did you go that night of the party?"
What the hell is he talking about? I looked around and the entire cafeteria was looking at me. "I told you, I just went home. Why does it matter so much? It was like weeks ago, just drop it," I said, getting defensive. Cyrus sat on the table and leaned in towards me.

"Yeah I'll drop it...Once you tell me about your night with Phoenix. Did you fuck him?"
I was too shocked to even respond, so for a couple of seconds, I just sat there, looking like an asshole.
"What the hell Cyrus? You can't be serious right now," I managed to say.

"I should've knew you are a fag just like him," he said as he leaned closer to my face. "I mean look at you. No wonder why you can't get any bitches."
I don't know why, but I stood there for a couple of seconds, holding his gaze and taking in what he said.  My heart soon began to boil, as if it was on a stove and set on fire.My fist curled under the table before I stood up and punched him, right in the eye.

Everyone starts to "Oooooh," and crowd around us. I was just going to leave it at that, but I loved the attention. I was craving it, so I grabbed him by his jean jacket and slammed him onto the floor before I began to climb on top of him and punch him repeatedly. one.....two....three....

It wasn't long until I felt someone kick me on my side, and there was Jermiah.
I fell to my side and groaned in pain. I was able to look up for a couple of seconds to see phones out and recording, and that gave me the power to stand back up on my feet and throw a punch at Jermiah.  "You son of a bitch I'll kill you! I'll kill you all!" I shouted at the top of my lungs as I banged his head onto the floor.

A few seconds later, I felt someone yank me by my hoodie and grip onto my waist.
I kept fighting. I kept trying to wiggle and push them off of me. "Get the hell off of me!" I shouted. As I'm being carried out of the cafeteria, I see Phoenix, standing there in front of the crowd, looking at me and we hold each other's gaze until we can't anymore.
༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

My dad picked me up. We didn't talk at all on the way home, but I could tell he wasn't mad, but more disappointed. I continued to look out the window until we pulled into the driveway. He took out the ignition and I was about to get out of the car when he whispered, "I don't understand."
I turned to look at him, but he was still looking down at his lap. "This is the 7th fight you had this year. They're going to expel you if you keep it up Ellis."

I took my hand off the door and leaned back into the seat. My dad reached for the papers that were sitting on the backseat on the floor. "You threatened this kid? Really? His parents are thinking about pressing charges and you better pray they change their minds." His voice got more firm, more angry.

"I'm sorry," I said, thinking that it'll immediately change his mood and it'll be alright, but she shakes his head and points his finger at me. "You're grounded. For now on, I'm taking you to school and I'm picking you up. No after school business with your friends. No driving the car around you hear me?" He gets out of the car and slams the door after he walks up the steps. I followed him. "You can't do that!" And as soon as I said that, he immediately turned around with his face full of rage.
"I'm your goddamn father. I can do whatever I want."

"But I have a project to do. We need the car dad."
He took off his coat and put it on the rack with a sarcastic look on his face. "And how is that my problem?"
He used my own words against me.
I felt like yelling in his face, maybe even punching him, but what happened the other night and how we talked about mom, kept me calm. So I just sighed and stomped up the stairs without saying a word.

I grabbed my laptop and immediately sent a text to Phoenix and told him to come over after school,and while I waited, I threw the random clothes on my floor into my closet and changed clothes because I felt like crap.
Around 7pm, I heard a tap at my window. I hopped out of bed and fixed my hair before I let him in. He was wearing a red crop top with a pair of jeans. His hair was damp.
After realizing that I was staring at him, I quickly looked away and sat on my bed. "I'm grounded, so you'll have to do the project by yourself..." I said quietly.

I could see that he didn't know what to do with himself because if he sat on my bed with me, I'd probably push him off... or maybe I wouldn't and that's what scares me. Phoenix shrugs his shoulders while squinting his eyes at me. "I don't get it."

"What do you not get? I'm grounded so you'll have to do it," I said louder this time. He shook his head. "No,I mean I don't get how you just let people get the best of you and make a scene for everyone." He said it as if he actually cares.

"It's none of your business anyway," I said looking away. Phoenix takes a step closer to my bed with his arms crossed. "Then why'd you ask me to come? You want to make out with me again and then act like it never happened?"

"Shit Phoenix. Keep your fucking voice down," I said looking at my door and back at him. "Let's just talk about this. Did you see the hashtag everyone's talking about?"
He nods. "You told people didn't you?" I asked him.

I could see the expression changing in his face as he scoffs and rolls his eyes. "Why the hell would I tell people? It wouldn't matter anyways because you have it good. You're friends with everyone and no one knows your gay meanwhile, everyone knows I am."
I shrug my shoulders. "I just don't want people to know yet. We can just keep it on the low for a couple of weeks."

"Weeks? I don't want you if we have to hide the fact that we like each other, Ellis." He walks back and forth. "You have no idea how hard it is for me."
"You can't play victim all the time. It's hard for me too."
He runs his fingers through his hair. "Yeah but at least I'm trying to make it work and what are you doing? Fucking Amelia so you can avoid the fact?"

I didn't say anything after that. I just looked down at my lap because he's right. I'm in love with him and I'm fucking everything up just because I don't want people to find out. What am I doing?

After minutes of silence, after minutes of him waiting for me to say something, he lets out a big sigh before turning around and heading towards the window.
Shit.
"I like what we have Phoenix." My voice is barely above a whisper, so I'm surprised when he stops with one hand on the window.

"I'm sorry about everything and sure I hide the fact but you can't say that I don't want to make it work."
I finally worked up the strength to look him in the eyes. "I'm new at this and if you can just give me a chance, I promise I'll drop everyone, I promise I won't keep it a secret." I stand up.
"But if you walk out that window, I'll lose myself again and I can't..." I'm now on the verge of tears. "I can't go through that again so please stay."

My heart is aching and my arms are craving his touch, but I try to keep it together. We just stand there looking at each other until I hear footsteps walking up the stairs. "Crap," I said, quickly wiping my tears with the back of my hand and shoving him in the closet. "Sorry," I whispered as I closed the door just before my dad walked in.

"Who are you talking to?"
"Wh- what do you mean?"
"I thought I heard a boy.....anyway, dinner is ready." I quickly nod and stand there awkwardly, hoping he doesn't ask anymore questions or go snooping through my room. After looking at me suspiciously for a while, he finally closed the door and I let out a big sigh.

I jumped when Phoenix came falling out of the closet with balls and clothes dropping on the floor. "Jesus you scared me," I said with my hands covering my heart.
He lets out a little laugh and I swear it's the cutest laugh I've ever heard. He's still lying there on his stomach, so I helped him up.
"I think you need to clean out your closet."