I gaze up at stars that have watched
the entirety of human history unfold.
That have led sailors and watched over
travelers and cast an immortal thrall over us.
And i feel incredibly small. I am perched upon
a speck of dust, a proton to an atom.
The stars have seen billions of lives,
and they will see billions more.
And all i want is to live forever, to stare
endlessly into them until i become the sky.
Three months ago, all i wanted was
to sink into the earth.
To vanish beneath her soil and leave nothing
behind but traces of memory evaporating like bitter cigarette smoke.
I would have been content to never see the stars again.
But now I cannot stare at them enough, now i have watched
twelve streaks of light dart across the sky.
Now i have perched on my little mote of dust and
become lost in the vastness of the universe.
Now i understand why i didn't die all those months ago
