˚ ·. · 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐋𝐃, to be able to experience sadness one must experience happiness to initialize those feelings. we long to savor those ephemeral moments of passing bliss we realize we will never be able to experience once more, bec...
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ꜰ ʀ ᴀ ɪ ʟ ᴛ ʏ
*°:⋆ₓₒ
⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆
Never once had it occurred to you that time was anything but yours. In fact, it always seemed to be the other way around. From that very moment ten years ago, your cognizance became monopolized by that sole fact; there was no way out of this fool's game and everyone knew that, however, your game was incited by another's conduct in which you wilted under its presence so candidly it was as if a second thought never occurred to you. Amidst this little phenomenon was a deposit of pivotal proceedings, ones that dictated your future, influenced by your past, materializing in the present; motivations had all derived from the tribulations annexed to your prerogative now nothing but ghostly evocations. It was as though you were stuck between a barrier of nothingness and a latent existence, somehow working together to achieve a feigned harmony where you just barely lived on...
You weren't in your own world, or time, or even the existence of your very own awareness, you were in the locus of everyone else. And it was funny...while you acknowledged this very dilemma, you were assisted with nothing, nothing at all; so in that cycle you were left stranded with, things became consistent as all you were able to do was watch. While everyone else lived their lives with such simplicity, there was no warning about how you felt, about how you were stuck in this never-ending contraption, just no care in the world about who you were. None at all.
At least, that was what it felt like.
It was an hour or perhaps even two in which your conscience adjusted to its wake from slumber and your eyes finally opened against the imperceptible cast of sun that captivated the entire room. Turning on your side, your right hand slithered underneath the freshly laundered pillow and your eyes focused on what was becoming of the world beyond the subsidiary framework working in coexistence with the confinement of the room. You wondered how long it would be until the nurses haled you out of the room for a moment of placidity from the disposition of medical assistance fettered all over your body once more just to cosset you until it was annoyingly overbearing.
As much as the thought of being withdrawn from your bed contented you, there was no escaping the wrath of what lay beyond the safeguard of the precedented aid. A small sigh was met with the more pure variant of atmosphere you had been impelled to wont, the lingering smell of antiseptics and sanitized machinery etched into the basis of your olfactory receptors. It would never leave-much less dispel from your mind and memory, even if you were to break away from this era of your life.
Certain nurses didn't dare say it to your face but after two long and tedious years, they knew the next time you were to leave this hospital permanently, it would be in a casket. From the initial day you were brought here, it didn't take long to assimilate and shoulder that outlook on your own terms. It was what any other person, possibly even some other fifteen-year old, would have resigned to at that very moment as well. No one could blame you, really. The Earth proffered her contrivances to the receivers in such an unfair way, that was all there was to it.
