Free Fall

:Chapter 21 : Another sophisticated blow in my plotline

Chapter 21

Another sophisticated blow in my plotline

(Unedited)

The crisp autumn air sways over the sandbars as leaves dance their way downstream making way to their destination in nature before being succumbed to their demise. Amber and Dryden making their way to wherever it is that they had in mind. Making me wonder why he had done what he did back at the food cupboard. 

Had he intentionally wanted someone to see his hand brushing mine ever so slightly? Had he seen the kiss that Christian and I shared in the jeep as the climax reached its peak? Maybe metaphorically speaking and I had been like the leaves racing towards their fated demise.

 My Black Hole, Supernova; whatever this had been now being deeply fated by Dryden. Though, baringly it hadn’t been his fault. 

He seemed happy with Amber and I was sure as they splashed cold water at each other; though I was sure that in October I wouldn’t have wanted to do such a thing as a result of receiving a cold. A sunset reflecting off of Dryden’s aviator sunglasses just before Amber leans in for a passionate kiss. If he had been happy with Amber, why would he have brushed his hand against mine? I had supposed it had been another sophisticated blow in my plotline.

“Come join us,” Amber tells me as I continue to sit in the sand as she pulls out her phone in a manner to take a selfie with me, a smile plastered on her face, showing she was having fun. No doubt that it would be on her social media later. 

Thinking it over, I got up and joined them building a sandman, adding features that they found on the beach as Dryden’s pop punk playlist played in the background; giving the sandman a trendy jock aesthetic to work with as both their fingers force a smile onto the sand. I’ve always wondered how does one person know what the fake circled figure is feeling, but I wasn’t about to bring that up. 

“This is going on the socials,” Dryden announces cheerfully as he pulls out his phone, taking a photo of Mr. Sandman. Without thinking, I trudged forward and placed a kiss on the sands cheek, probably guaranteeing I’d never get this chance again as I’m sure one of the two had taken a picture of it, making a picture of the fun that I had lived in the moment with; having it be followed by a group selfie with Dryden and Amber as she instantly posted it on Instagram for her followers to see. 

As the sunset turned into night, a firepit left by others before us had been lit, sodas and a Spotify playlist had been portioned for the occasional teenage hangout. A relief had been fulfilled when I hadn’t seen any alcohol. A referendum of Dryden’s party and a drunken call to Christian. What I hadn’t expected was to hear Dryden tell me that we needed to talk somewhere alone. What could he possibly want to talk about that didn’t involve Amber? Without another thought, I agree as he leads me down a path just off the sandbar. 

“What did you?” I start to ask when we stop, and I place my hand on my hips. I didn’t need to finish asking. The remaining part of the question led to what had happened earlier. The part where he brushed his hand against mine, the affirmation of him not wanting Amber to overhear. 

“About earlier,” he begins, confirming anxiety about what I had already figured out. An uneasy tension between us. The years of what could have been said, now hanging in the balance. “I’m not,” he tells me, and leaves it at that, leaving the tensional drift of thick autumn coolness between us. 

“My parents could’ve seen you do that. Gloria could’ve seen it,” I tell him as my frustration shows, and I want to spill everything down to every feeling I have at the moment. “It’s not easy being gay with religious parents. You’ve known them your entire life,” I tell him as I feel tears welling up in the corner of my eye, yet not wanting to cry in front of him.